New York Mets Inury Report
-Yoenis Cespedes: OUT (Heel)
-David Wright: OUT (Everything)
-Tim Tebow: OUT (Hand)
-Noah Syndergaard: OUT (Virus)
-Front Office: OUT (Brain Damage)
-Mets Fans: BLACKED OUT (Whiskey)
“There are those people who are in your corner no matter what, you can’t do any wrong, even when you do wrong. And then there are those people that no matter what you do they’re going to dislike you and that’s not going to change.” - Brett Favre #DraftEve#MMO
BREAKING: After giving up a Home Run on the first pitch of the season, the Miami Marlins have been officially eliminated from playoff contention #OpeningDay
City of Chicago Power Rankings
1. Chicago Cubs
2. Loyola Chicago Ramblers
3. Chicago Bears
4. Chicago Blackhawks
5. Chicago White Sox
...
297. Chicago YMCA
298. Chicago Shuffleboard
299. Chicago Bulls
Projected #MarchMadness Bracket Pool standings:
You, after 25 hours of research: 34th (out of 33)
Your mom, picking based on which mascot she thinks is cuter: 3rd
Guy’s 15th bracket out of 17 he made this year: 2nd
Girl who picked entire bracket in 7 seconds: 1st