Hunter Parker

I used to actually use Twitter; now I just talk about soccer | @SportingKC | @Memphis901FC | @USMNT Simul justus et peccator

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@idanbabyonchain Which is why it’s bad.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@winnaerandart @idanbabyonchain That’s not at all the same thing. That’s technological advancement, not adaptation of art.

The best story adaptations use the original as a framework to tell a new story (e.g. O Brother Where Art Thou as The Odyssey), rather than retelling the story with character assassination.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@idanbabyonchain Live adaptations of beloved animated IP have two outcomes:

1) Stay faithful to the source material and produce a stale re-telling of the same story.

2) Change key elements and fundamentally alter the story so that it can barely even carry the same title.

It’s bad either way.

[Gregg Beerholder 🍺 @MLShater]

I can’t wait until Sebastian Berhalter moves to Europe so I can finally support him

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@kirkkinsey I feel like you’re trying to make fun of football bros suggesting “improvements” to soccer, but I would unironically love this.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@idanbabyonchain “How are they ever gonna get it right if they stop?”

They’ll never get it right. That’s the point. It’s an absurdist goal. It’s literally “damned if you do, damned if you don’t.” There’s no point in continuing because it was a fools errand in the first place.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@MedMajic369 @AlexiLalas That’s obviously a twig.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@Pras_fpl So, what you’re saying is, teams will play an extra 30 minutes, and if nobody scores, penalties will be the deciding factor?

Revolutionary.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

I knew it. I KNEW it.

Europeans, & especially the English, can NOT tolerate the idea that the USA may possibly be a good footballing nation, so they downplay anything that might suggest it.

The rational response is "Wow, this Paraguay team is no joke!"
Rob's response, however:

[Rob Dawson @RobDawsonESPN]

The aura is gone, the penalty shootout invincibility smashed. Germany are no longer a World Cup super power. It’s back to the drawing board after another early exit. From Boston.
https://t.co/mhiagkXKiM

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

"It's just Paraguay" squad lookin real silly right about now.

[Matthew Doyle @MattDoyle76]

From 2022 to 2026: Tracking the Growth of MLS – minutes, goals & games – on the World's Biggest Stage. MLS players are playing more, scoring more & doing it for better teams.

https://t.co/azkIPrfjpt

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

Elite-tier ragebait.

Europeans: “Americans don’t understand! There’s nothing like a British heat wave!”

Also Europeans: “Ehrm, fix your climate issues America; it’s too hot there!”

[Henrick Johansson @compliantvc]

It will be over 40 degrees (104 degrees Fahrenheit) in the American city of Tucson, Arizona today

Dozens of people like likely melt

Yet American media is dead silent on this

Instead, they obsess over the heat wave in Europe

Worry about your own warming climate, Americans

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

They won a game they were expected to win. This has done nothing to add pressure to either co-host.

When did JJ become so delusional?

[Jermaine Jones @Jermainejunior]

Jesse Marsch and Canada have put the pressure on the USA and Mexico

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

It’s crazy that people are playing up an obvious tongue-in-cheek “you’re irrelevant” trash talk. It’s the journalistic equivalent of the “what the fuck is a kilometer” meme.

Nobody is minimizing Bosnian citizens or their geopolitical struggles. It’s just “sit down lil bro.”

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@mikeachimugu01 Don’t make me tap the sign:

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

🧵For years, Europeans claimed that their dominance was insurmountable, because only their youth, through their domestic leagues, had the cultural institution and pathway to success at high levels of football. This World Cup is finally demonstrating why that premise was flawed.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@ExUtahSports It’s not that deep bro

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@DefenseBaron Booooooo this post is bad and you should feel bad.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

Fuck doomerism, I’ma start believing.

[Hunter Parker @hunterparker99]

@abc7abigail @ConcacafEdgar Nah girl that shit was funny. You do you.