The Ben Commandments

middle aged Canberra man yelling into the Muskian dystopia. Wishes there were more discussions about peanut butter and celery as a snack option.

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@Leah_CBR

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

This one was enjoyable.

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@dresdendoll Noice.

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@themiasandrist Beyond cool.

[Blossom 🌸 @Suzzy0310]

My dad paid $800/month child support. I only saw $20 of it.

18 years. 12 checks a year.
Mom said “Your dad never helped.”
Dad said “I send money every month.”
I believed Mom. Kids do.

Turned 18. Found his bank statements in a box.
Line after line:

[Jamie Gibbo @gibbo1012]

For the France and Allo Allo fans 🤣🤣🎥🎥⚽️⚽️ #alloallo

[Ladytron Fan Account @Lady_FanAccount]

"Teenage Dirtbag" is 100% autobiographical. Brendan B. Brown (vocals) wrote the song based on his own adolescence on Long Island.

Released in 2000 as the first single from Wheatus, it became one of the greatest anthems of the 2000s and exploded even more after entering the soundtrack of the film Loser.

[Jamie Gibbo @gibbo1012]

For the Scotland fans 🤣🤣⚽️⚽️

[bug girl @buggirl]

in nature if a monkey hoarded 1 trillion bananas the other monkeys would beat that monkey to death and take his bananas

[Jamie Gibbo @gibbo1012]

New England panini stickers 🤣🤣⚽️⚽️

[Liam Nissan™ @theliamnissan]

Yup

[Stacey❤💙 @_Stacey1987]

@lcrooow Free kick against for Mihocek having a head

[Collingwood FC @CollingwoodFC]

Less than two weeks ago Podiatrist Mitch Podhajski went to work to see his patients. Today he did this.... 🤯

The 27-year-old looks right at home in black and white!

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

The staff are people too. You’re just a gormless twat in a Qantas lounge mate. Go fuck yourself and try saying ‘please’.

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

What the funk doctor said and chiko rolls are amongst humanity’s greatest achievements. #aussie #boganpride

[Funkdoctor @Docsthename]

To all the girls I’ve loved before 🎶

[Phil Billingham @PhilBillingham]

We always knew Dad was one of the many men who went to Aberfan on that dreadful day in 1966. I have a vivid childhood memory of him coming home filthy and upset

But he would never talk about it, we had no records and now he has died

But then we saw this and we think it’s him

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@Hellie1982 Glad you are in the mend!

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@Hellie1982 @JohnlovesGrunge Challening your inner Sandy Olson this evening?

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@Hellie1982 Fuck that guy, he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. Tell him to fuck right off.

[The Ben Commandments @iambenno]

@Hellie1982 Blergh!