Nina Kern

9-uh not Neena. Actor. Comedian. Co-host of @whitecollarspod

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

What if they called it the Rock Hard Cafe instead of the Hard Rock Cafe?

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Why didn’t you guys tell me that Baby Reindeer isn’t about Rudolph?

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Forget a dating app. I’m about to get a job at Costco cuz no one told me how many fine men work here.

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

This really is not what I needed to see while demolishing a pint of ice cream

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Bringing only the essentials

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

I know I’m in northeast ohio by the way the women wear blue eyeliner on their lower lash line

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

No one told me that if you’re 31, eating cheesecake after 11:30 pm comes with consequences

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

@toastpos new update is so bad I wish I was using Aloha

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Student: “oh your name is Ms. K?! I thought it was Ms. CAKE!”

That’s my name now.

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Stand-up comedy math is making $25 on a show and spending $45 at the venues bar

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

@gabby_aok @__lexandthecity

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Don’t be a sugar daddy if you can’t tip 20%

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Pros of being an adult: I can eat as much candy as I want

Cons of being an adult: I ate as much candy as I wanted and now my tummy hurts

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Is it just me, or is the $20,000 you win on family feud not that impressive anymore?

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

True heartbreak is accidentally leaving your to go box at the restaurant

[trash jones @jzux]

why would i save for retirement when i can buy knickknacks

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

I feel like my problems today could be solved with a soft pretzel and a little nacho cheese cup

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

Did you guys hear that Ted Kaczynski died? That really blew up my day.

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

When I said I wanted a hot girl summer, I didn’t mean I wanted my car to overheat!!!

[Nina Kern @iamninakern]

When I said I wanted hot girl summer, I didn’t mean sweating through my underwear by 8:12 am