d tucci

I tweet nonsense

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@cdolan92 The city of Pittsburgh firemen are salary

[Katherine Argent @effthealgorithm]

Search is full of ads and wrong answers. Every other email is an ad. Prime Video charges you and shows ads. Paramount? Ads. Peacock? YouTube? Hulu? Ads followed by more ads. Netflix full of ads. Meta and X, every other thing is an ad. Pinterest is nothing but ads. AI is in everything. AI finishes sentences incorrectly and won’t stop. AI reads your email and search history to target you with more ads. Every time you open an app or visit a site there’s an update making it worse. In a hurry? First, click here to agree to terms you don’t have time to read and must accept. You need an account to do that. Change your temporary password. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email and enter that code. Now use a passkey. Your password is too simple to remember. Change it. No, not like that. Now log on. Enter your 2FA code. Check your email for a code… Welcome back! We’ve updated our terms of service and privacy policy (you have none). Subscribe to the site. Subscribe to Netflix. Subscribe to toilet paper. Subscribe to these groceries. Pay a membership fee for the right to subscribe then tip your driver who delivers the subscriptions your membership lets you subscribe to. Time to work? We’ve got to update your laptop and will slow down everything you do until you agree to update. But first, click here to agree. Update installed — your laptop’s broken now. It doesn’t matter, since your boss just replaced you with AI. Go to your phone to complain on social media. Wait, your phone needs an update so we can add more AI. Click here. Oh sorry, your phone can’t handle this update. Now it’s useless. Go get the newest phone. Here’s a text from a friend, an email, a voice mail they left three days ago but you didn’t see until now because of sync problems with the cloud. It’s their GoFundMe. Their MLM. Their Patreon. Never mind, you didn’t respond to their text within 9 minutes and now you’re no longer friends. They blocked you. Make new friends. Download this app to find people in your area. In your neighborhood. On your street. Two doors down from you. Do you know this person yet, we think you’d get along. You need an account to use this app. That username is taken. Enter a password. Not that one, you used it on another site. You need to be connected to WiFi to download the app. Allow the app to connect to other devices on your network. Allow the app to access your contacts, know your precise location, store your credit card details. Oops, sorry, we got hacked now all that info is available on the web. There’s a class action suit. You can join. It’ll take a decade to get your $3.73 share of the ten billion settlement. We’ll send it via PayPal or deposit it to your bank, just tell us those details. Oh no, another hack. That info is circulating now, too. Here’s a spam call, a spam email, a spam text. Why are you angry? Why are you talking about getting rid of your phone? Why don’t you like AI, it lets us make all of this easier? Do you know how ridiculous that sounds? This is progress. You’ll be left behind. Do you want to be left behind? Do you???

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

When I was a tiny baby a witch put a curse on me to eat chips.

[Steve Ferguson @lsferguson]

After TSA is funded, members of Congress should still stand in line. They aren't royalty. We had a revolution to get rid of that. They are our employees. This is a great place to remind them of that!

[Fred @Grand_handsomer]

There wasn’t no war when Dunk and Egg had new episodes every Sunday

[Neet @neet_sol]

Human resources is a funny title considering they barely act like humans and aren’t a great resource at all

[Project Big Screen @ProjBigScreen]

Beloved actress Catherine O’Hara, who was known for her roles in Home Alone, Best In Show, Schitt’s Creek, and more, has sadly passed away at the age of 71

Rest In Peace ♥️

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@JoshPateCFB I believe Michael Haywood (Pitt) has him beat.

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@CivGame Why are you calling these “new” when they already existed in Civ 6?

[d tucci @iamtucci]

This and TMNT pizza

[allison harvard burke @alliharvard]

this genuinely altered my view on pizza and i've been chasing an unrealistic expectation ever since.

[erika @yeeeerika]

bad weekend to be a hot dog

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@Snapple why the hell my drink out of a 6 pack come like this?

[hamma @corndogs4brekie]

Tony Soprano and every one of his comares

[t3mple is seeing cortis @catyufan]

If taco bell employees get your order correct they get fired

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@tacobell what is this shit. You guys don’t even try anymore.

[Michigan Hockey @umichhockey]

Honoring the resilience, strength, and brilliance of the Black community throughout history.

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@k_massacci LOL

[d tucci @iamtucci]

Whoever wins will get blamed for World War III. Let’s remember that. #Election2024

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@KDiByouC #jail

[d tucci @iamtucci]

@K_Tambo Who is eligible next year?