UTD guy

//MANCHESTER UNITED🔴!//GGMU.
CRISTIANO🐐

[UTD guy @ib652]

@Utd_Olly15 Everyone has felt his wrath. No exceptions.

[𝗠𝘂𝗵𝗲𝗲 ♛ @muheediva01]

Kids will get you locked up.

A lil girl in my son’s class told her teacher that she takes baths with her uncle.

So of course, they did their investigation.

Tell me why the uncle is 2 years old.

[mariana Z @mariana057]

Physician: Your body has ran out of magnesium.

Me: 0mg

[DaEvans @daevans13]

@FabrizioRomano @JBurtTelegraph @jfelixdiaz He can play right wing

[UTD guy @ib652]

@FabrizioRomano @JBurtTelegraph @jfelixdiaz Buying olise for 150mil is the dumbest thing I can ever think of.

[່ @franchiseford]

man said united > england

[Hanch Tarchup Jr. @misharipov]

I just don't understand why women think they need all these surgeries

[☔ @Whotfismick]

The way life continues after people die is one of the most humbling things ever

[Richard Medhurst @richimedhurst]

Literally half the problems on this planet can be traced back to the UK. Including the US and Israel. It's extraordinary.

[Design Chief Priest @dnaijatechguy]

Toothache will send you back to your maker 😂

[Quality Learing Center @qualitylearnc]

Be the rapist that the girl refuses to block

[𝐍𝐚𝐮𝐭 @nautfcb]

that’s quite an age gap

[Robert Wilkinson @robertwlk]

40 years ago today, l asked my childhood sweetheart, my best friend and the most gorgeous woman l know to marry me.

All three said no.

[David Ornstein @David_Ornstein]

🚨 EXCL: Bayern Munich exploring move to sign Rio Ngumoha. 17yo Liverpool winger primary #FCBayern target for left side & aware of pursuit. No contact yet between clubs. #LFC insist not for sale + plan to strengthen attack rather than weaken @TheAthleticFC https://t.co/mYbWdds6Ip

[, @Zvbear]

Women in their 30s when they see a 21 year old girl in the room

[Catachi @itachi_senpai1]

PoV: Your wife after you asked for DNA Test of your kids.

[BRICS News @BRICSinfo]

JUST IN: 🇮🇪🇮🇱 Ireland bans Israeli ministers Itamar Ben-Gvir and Bezalel Smotrich from entering the country.

[PFA @PFA]

❤️

[PFA @PFA]

A record breaker and the Premier League players rate it 🫡

Man United’s Portuguese magnifico is in the Top Six for PFA Players’ Player of the Year 🏆

[Fabrizio Romano @FabrizioRomano]

🤍⚡️ Endrick: “Cristiano Ronaldo playing for Real Madrid made me want to come to Real even more”.

“He’s my idol, he’s my reference and I could never say no to the greatest club in the world”.