igotmumps1234

lillian af

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

i’m going to stop fucking people unless they say i love you in missionary by accident

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

just realized when i left my hinge date’s house i don’t think i flushed my yellow ass hungover pee

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

how are you supposed to rizz with a peanut allergy

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

fucking a masc is like being a sister wife to 8 other baddies with bangs

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

why are the hottest people the evilest

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

the eyebrows are staying. sorry to all my gay fans 🙏

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

@t0eL1cker i need this halifax level rizz

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

i must stop relying on the straps of others

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

@norathdakota it’s bad

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

that was really the very last straw

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

Chill Cool Girls cry when their dad won’t stop eating triscuits in the same room as them

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

so rewarding when someone likes the cryptic story post you made about them. like sending a cipher to your spy lover overseas and getting one back from a messenger pigeon

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

something cathartic about scrolling back on your ex’s new partner’s instagram to find pictures of when they were your age

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

create mode is just tweeting for losers

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

@norathdakota that was a wonderful theatre experience

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

but like she’s not

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

serenity shit talking:
“she thinks she’s very cerebral and she’s, like, not”

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

@NoraB99006128 should i just die on purpose

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

wow

[igotmumps1234 @igotmumps1234]

i think greta gerwig is sexy