ihaveataser

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

When the caterer you fired less than a month before your wedding because she was SO unhinged is now getting lots of negative attention… chef’s kiss. #TableBoston

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

@jessemermell Turn the whole day off then on again

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

@MatthewBroude Taza chocolate is a great option - consumable, unique.

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

My life would be so different if my BookIt record had been my starter credit score

[Boze Herrington, Library Owl 😴🧙‍♀️ @SketchesbyBoze]

instead of having a credit score everyone should be assigned a library card at birth, and the card is good for libraries all over the nation and there are prizes for having read a certain number of books.

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

Has anyone called Prigozhin a mini coup-er yet

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

@Space_Slugg Man nature is so metal

[NBC News @NBCNews]

Hundreds are still missing and feared dead after a boat carrying migrants sank in Greek waters last week.

Advocates say they’re frustrated the sunken migrant ship has garnered far less attention and resources than the Titan rescue efforts for 5 people. https://t.co/NYRoA3X3um

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

If they can compound my cat’s medication to taste like chicken why can’t I get an antidepressant that tastes like an Oreo

[Connor Daley @ConnorDaleyVT]

🎶
I’m a bitch
I’m an orca
Sinking yachts
Just off Majorca
I’m a sinner
I’m a whale
Imma hit you with my tail

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

An an xennial… I will use ellipses… and emojis 😘

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

@hankgreen Blep

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

You know you’re an xennial if you both wanted to be lifted up by Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing, and also really wanted to hang out with Patrick Swayze in To Wong Foo

[Rebekah Jones @GeoRebekah]

My family is not safe. My son has been taken on the gov's orders, and I've had to send my husband and daughter out of state for their safety.

THIS is the reality of living in DeSantis' Florida.

There is no freedom here. Only retaliatory rule by a fascist who wishes to be king

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

@GeoRebekah @vitusspehar

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

Sometimes I think about all the adorable, scrungly, weirdo cats that existed pre-internet and I get so sad that we’ll never get to see them

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

I wrote to Dear Hank and John about memorializing my father by launching a rubber chicken with fireworks solely to use the sign off Memento Poultry

[Hank Green @hankgreen]

Did someone say #WorldGothDay?

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

Just watched the new @kathleenmadigan special Hunting Bigfoot - she’s just such a gem of a comedian. I feel like she occupies her own space like no one else does.

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

On a scale of 1 to 10 how much would you lose your mind if @lizzo played the Cisco hold music on her flute live

[ihaveataser @ihaveataser]

@jessemermell I have similar help