drank

[drank @ildrank]

@shukran___ Hope its New Jersey and call up chief keef

[New York Basketball @NBA_NewYork]

Good morning

[G 🇭🇹 @RubbBandGrant]

Nigga called the radio station for love advice that nigga T Pain said “I got jus what ya need brand new Chris brown n t pain” 🤣🤣🤣

[Jozu 🇵🇦 @JozuJoestarr]

white niggas be like “she got a tight little ass”

[watergun @tersseer]

all these mountains to climb will i everest?

[bum @BattleRapBum]

texted her “spurs lead” she knew to come blow me

[COCHISE @cochise]

NEW YORK CITY, YOU LISTEN TO ME. IF YOU'RE NEAR A CONVENIENCE STORE RIGHT NOW, ANY TYPE OF 24-HOUR STORE, GO INTO THE STORE RIGHT NOW AND PUT YOUR HAND IN THE CASH REGISTER FOR NO REASON

[Wopavelli @TheWopObama]

In American slang we often refer to money as “benjamins” this is a subtle reference to Benjamin Netanyahu, an American folk figure who takes all of our money

[tequila baggins @miamibrando]

They all made fun of me at school and called me “Boyfriend Dick” and “Mr. Make Her Cum First”

[PatchFox @PatchF0x]

My mayor is Muslim
My bagels are Jewish
My Christian is Dior
AND IT'S KNICKS IN FUCKING FOUR

[Johnny McCauley 🃏 @johnny6oat]

Veeze said “ imma have to squeeze my hand past 20 thousands to get some lint” he got it

[grace @gracefishlove]

(at the dentist) u forgot to ask but i am sexually active

[alex @vaudevillehook]

Is rack city walkable

[Old Man Rattle @OldRattleMan]

white people be like my axolotl just got shadowbanned on pinterest

[justin serb-ert 🇷🇸🍉 @markocantdunk]

Daily affirmations:

- I’m not chopped
- my jumper is wet
- that noise my car is making isn’t a big deal
- my friends don’t hate me
- I will not miss fast break layups
- my fits are hard

[h @jamtoastaurchai]

People pleasing elephant: I can leave the room if you want it’s no problem for me

[swinky @swinkying]

bro eat ur pussy before it gets cold

[token of spite @a_fake_rolex_]

why she keep calling my phone speaking sexually

[🤠 @iluvbvnny]

girls be acting freaky at the wrong time you at the drive thru and you ask her what she want and she's like "You" bitch there's 3 cars behind us