Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier

They/Them. Mental Health Warrior. Freewheeling Pansexual. Trying to be okay with myself. I wish there was a scent-of-old-books-and-cinnamon incense.

[𝚊𝚕𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚜𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚣𝚘 👽 @alteredschizo]

Important to know:

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

I often find myself lost in thought. Now? I miss Chester. LP made music that made me feel human. Chester would scream into the mic, while I couldn't. Sing the words that I wished I could say. All the feelings. The intensity. He gave me a voice.

@LPFamily
#MakeChesterProud

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

What do you do when you want a relationship (platonic here) to work because you were close to them, but it feels like now they don't care? Or they frequently seem annoyed/mad at you? In this instance, I only see them in a certain setting sometimes. I don't know what I did wrong.

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

@courtneycstl27 It's lovely! I can't wait to see it with the colour!

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

She might not even remember me at all, but it's worth a shot. I don't know if this'll help at all, but I was in scrubs the entire three months I was there. And, if she sees this. I want to tell you that I appreciate you, and I hope your days are brighter than they were back then.

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

Hey, I know I haven't been active (my apologies), but I was wondering if there was any chance you could help me find someone. She came to PCCA in Sacred Heart (Spokane WA) back in 2014, somewhere in the time frame of August to November of that year.

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

But, I was too shy and I didn't really talk much. Ever since that day, I have regretted not saying it back to her. She seemed genuine and I would love to be friends with her. I'm sure I'm way off with the name, or spelled it wrong, but I think it might've been Taron or Terra.

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

@StephDaugherty1 I'm on several different medications, but I haven't found any solid information regarding their interaction with memory. Depression and anxiety are definitely things to consider though. I'll look into it further and ask my psychiatrist again next time I see him.

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

Anyone know what could cause sudden short-term memory loss in my early 20s? I think it started a couple months ago. I'm blanking on the rest of sentences while talking, I forget what I'm doing, what I've asked, things people said, the day/date, etc. It's been getting worse.

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

@MayDeitrick Thank you so much, I appreciate you. I'll definitely check out that link! 💜

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

@courtneycstl27 Thank you. 💜

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

One of my favourite characters once said something like: "I'm not afraid of dying, I'm afraid of forgetting". Maybe that sounds dramatic, but that sums up my fear a bit. I'm not looking for a diagnosis. Any help/info would be greatly appreciated.

#MemoryLoss #Health #Forgetting

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

I've tried calling about it, talking to my doctor, researching a bit, etc., but no help. I want to schedule with neuro, but I have to be referred, and my appts are set for a month or more out. Doctor said it could be a type of seizure (brain temporarily quits creating memories).

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

And if you're the person standing on that ledge, about to jump; or holding those pills in the palm of your hand, wondering if you'll go peacefully; I see you, I love you, and I want you here. You matter. If nothing else, let this be your reason.

Stay.

#SuicidePrevention

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

Sometimes I share too much. Other times, I shut down completely and say nothing at all. Mental illness can - quite literally - be a killer, silent or not. It's easy to say "reach out for help", but oftentimes people like me struggle to do that in any capacity.

#INeedHelp

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

Keep in mind that it is also not your fault if a loved one dies by suicide. It's easy to put the burden of loss on yourself and carry it with you, but you are not to blame. If you've felt this kind of loss, I understand your pain.

#NotYourFault

[Rocket 'Spriggan' Gontier @illsinkwithyou]

@EJroseWoof I said this to another friend of mine recently, but things seem darker for a while after losing someone you care about - like the vibrancy of the colours around you have become dull and faded. But it won't be that way forever. I'm here if you need anything. Always. 💜