kezia

im funny in theory

[kezia @immortalanex]

i fucking hate 2020 i got my heart broken but at least i got bangs now fuck

[kezia @immortalanex]

literally nobody's calling you sexist/toxic or whatever for not wanting to watch a movie. how does this even make sense

[kezia @immortalanex]

nobody:
someone on the internet: didnt realize i was a toxic, sexist white man for not wanting to watch captain marvel!!!

[kezia @immortalanex]

also imagine: kim possible live action but its basically john wick-styled

[kezia @immortalanex]

13 year old me listened to evanescence and thought i was deep and edgy as fuck somebody shoulda slap me

[kezia @immortalanex]

if i was a fucking mugger i'd mug that 12 year old with $2500 gucci sweater and $3000 yeezys

[kezia @immortalanex]

#YouTubeRewind2018 sucks? yes, but considering the amount of youtubers milking it by saying how much they hate the video and gaining millions of views? that don't suck that much, huh?

[kezia @immortalanex]

me: hi
teen girls in tumblr 2013 era: omg like just touch my butt and buy me chicken nuggets and we can watch netflix all day lol pizza is life pizza for president and listen to arctic monkeys and 1975 with my dreamcatcher while reading larry fanfics

[kezia @immortalanex]

im gonna stop being a depressed bitch and dance to ali-a intro song on loop for 30 hours

[kezia @immortalanex]

wtf suddenly had an aggressive flashback to this video
https://t.co/NVRt27Bsey

[kezia @immortalanex]

idubbbz is my favorite cop

[kezia @immortalanex]

woke up today at 5 20 to my grandpa yelling bout some nonsense downstairs. they say only the good die young well theyre fucking correct

[kezia @immortalanex]

"im getting old and GAY. this could kill me" -idubbbz (big mood rn)

[kezia @immortalanex]

i wonder how's stacy's mom lmao

[kezia @immortalanex]

indos be like "ijin share ya kak" on a stolen picture

[kezia @immortalanex]

random kid: "surely posting this on facebook will let everyone know i've kissed a lot of people and i have smoked and im proud"

[kezia @immortalanex]

cooking are only for women? yes ofc, only women gets hungry. men? nah they lack the excretion system and their body solely runs on body sprays

[kezia @immortalanex]

me *sits all day* *doesnt move* *always eat* "@ god why am i gaining weight?? ? life is un fa ir"
God (probably) "u dumb as hell"

[kezia @immortalanex]

saddest moment of the year https://t.co/oqRBCIeG7n

[Gorilla Foundation @kokotweets]

The Gorilla Foundation is sad to announce the passing of our beloved Koko | https://t.co/ers1vGAlQ3 https://t.co/O3bvTDoQvE

[kezia @immortalanex]

honestly? one of the real modern heroes is h3h3 ethan