incorrect the good place

Incorrect the good place quotes ✨
quotes aren't mine // owned by @raysxntiago

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Eleanor: Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both.

Tahani: I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

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Michael: if you took a shot for every bad decision you made on earth, how drunk would you be?

Tahani: Maybe a bit tipsy

Chidi: drunk

Jason: wasted

Eleanor: dead.

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Jason, to Tahani: I’m going to sing a song for you

Jason: it’s called ‘how i feel about you’

Jason: [takes a deep breath]

Jason: [high pitched screaming]

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hey everyone! it's me, lol. so yestrday i reached 1,000 followers here.
i opened this account in june, about 7 months ago, and it was really amazing ever since. i made friends, laughed, and had lots of fun.
so i just wanted to say thank you. i forking love you guys.
- me

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Tahani: I can’t believe you and Chidi broke the bed.

Jason: You two must’ve gotten too wild.

Eleanor: Haha yeah…

[the night before]

Eleanor: I bet you can’t jump high enough to touch the ceiling.

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Jason: I got arrested for being too cool.

Eleanor: All charges were dropped because there was no supporting evidence.

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Tahani: I made you this friendship bracelet.

Eleanor: I’m not really a jewelry person.

Tahani: You don’t have to wear it.

Eleanor: I’m going to wear it forever. Back off.

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Chidi: I’m Eleanor Shellstrop’s emergency contact.

Police Officer: So you’re here to pick her up?

Chidi: I’m here to remove myself as her emergency contact.

[Ted Danson @TedDanson]

Grateful 4 another season with these 4king guys. Soul Squad 4ever! #TheGoodPlace

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Jason: Hey, what time is it?

Eleanor: I don’t know, pass me the recorder.

Eleanor: [plays recorder loudly]

Chidi: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE RECORDER AT 2 AM?

Eleanor: It’s 2 am.

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i have 800 followers! that's a lot. wow. thank you so much guys :)

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Eleanor: I’m gonna take you out.

Tahani: Great, it’s a date!

Eleanor: I meant that as a threat.

Tahani: See you at six!

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Demon: We have your son.

Michael: I don’t have a son?

Demon: Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off his sandwich?

Michael: Holy fork, you have Jason.

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Eleanor: Thank you for agreeing to see me.

Chidi: I didn’t. You just walked in and started talking.

Eleanor: Look, I don’t have time for a history lesson.

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Tahani: Jason, do you any have fears?

Jason: Yes. What if something dope happens… And I’m not there to see it?

[NBC Entertainment @nbc]

"What kind of woman doesn't have an axe?" - Rosa Diaz

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Eleanor: We’re playing Scrabble. It’s a nightmare.

Tahani: Scrabble? Scrabble’s great.

Eleanor: Not when you’re playing with Chidi, it’s not. He puts words like “ephemeral”. And I put “dog”.

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Eleanor: Jason had a lot of ups and downs. May he rest in peace.

Michael: He died?

Chidi: Not yet.

Tahani: He stole her shrimps.

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Chidi: You're so bad at math, Eleanor!

Eleanor: I went to a public school in Arizona. They told us dinosaurs went extinct because an asteroid turned them gay.

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Tahani: [holding a bottle] Is this whiskey or perfume?

Eleanor: [chugs entire bottle]

Eleanor: It’s perfume.