s.m.m.emadi.ch

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

http://t.co/0J7pZ21C The most embarrassing thing about mistaking pilates class for pirates class is concealing my musket.

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

http://t.co/cR3Ew4y7 One time I smashed my face into a keyboard and accidentally wrote the fifth Twilight book.

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

Whenever I cut a zucchini I like to pretend that I'm the Hulk's rabbi. http://t.co/skvXWTGX

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

If I was an Oreo, how would you eat me? Wrong. It's a trick question. People can't be Oreos. http://t.co/PYjVALpl

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

This Super Market doesn't even sell capes. http://t.co/Jo3I81EQ

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

http://t.co/Nrb2igZi Some call it drug abuse. I say the drugs get what they deserve.

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

The biggest thing I've learned at art school is the art of disappointing my father. http://t.co/Xp7lUIBT

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

Sooo much pressure as a woman to not have a mustache http://t.co/uiBQoqAX

[s.m.m.emadi.ch @itman]

All out of clean spoons so I guess I'll just eat this fat free yogurt with my gun http://t.co/23dQHb1A