Crystal Fawn

Second generation psychic who refuted her gifts, got “real jobs” in open floor plan offices, and humbly returned to the field of metaphysics

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

what if the only reason I moved to new york was because i saw coyote ugly when I was eighteen?

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

@salmanso_ Arriving fashionably late but time is a construct and works differently in each dimension ⊹𖦹⊹ Second generation psychic here—the deities I work with say you have an idea but the building blocks don’t yet exist. Tell me more!

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

Pig butchering, but instead of sending hot crypto tips we just talk to people about the democratic process and help them make informed decisions

[Read Jackson Rising @JPHilllllll]

If you want to know why people have lost faith in capitalism, this might help

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

Why is it that some of us don’t really get eyebrows?

[All The Right Movies @ATRightMovies]

ALIEN was released 44 years ago today. One of the definitive science fiction/horror movies, its influence is still seen to this day. The behind-the-scenes story of how the film was made is a fascinating one...

A THREAD

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[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

@davidcinema Reprise (2006)

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

I simply MUST meet Oz*mp*c’s PR team

[Sarah Zhang @sarahzhang]

Ozempic doesn't just suppress your appetite.

I talked to patients who took the drug to lose weight— only to also effortlessly stop biting their nails, compulsively shopping, drinking alcohol, and so on.

https://t.co/HUSfypuWoL

[Zephyr On Call (hibernating - back 2024) @zephyr_on_call]

how is it 2023 and nobody's come up with a satisfying explanation as to why cell phones never show up in our dreams if we're using them for 12 hours a day?

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

@alexanderchee I hate to be the one to tell you this, but…

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

@tombubul Extremely trustworthy!! Excellent placement etc etc

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

It’s hard to trust people who don’t use all their mirrors

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

Everyone is wearing the same outfits and honestly we look ridiculous

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

@SeeJaneMarie Wetlands. It’s a masterpiece imho.

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

Hilarious to me that the youth believes they can “outrun” capitalism with cryptocurrency

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

Life with my four year old is like Survivor and I keep getting booted off the island

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

I know roller skating is “back” but I will be purchasing rollerblades instead

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

When dealing with family it’s really important to know if you’re a board member or a shareholder

[Crystal Fawn @itscrystaland]

I have almost mastered my mother’s art of redirecting people’s totally unhinged narcissistic ramblings toward something bigger than themselves but holy shit it’s a lot of work

[Durgadas Allon Duriel, LCSW @DurgadasADuriel]

The greatest currency, more than money or gold, is attention. It is energy that is harvested, and ultimately, we get to decide what we will watch, read, listen to, etc. Attention is extraordinarily powerful in what it can create and do, magically and psychologically.