Javier Hernandez

“Mediocre at best” 🤷🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

Every setback is a set up for a comeback.

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

Paging @nycguidovoice and @cumtownbot

[🇺🇸 🦅Simple Man 🦅🇺🇸 @Soaringeagle45]

BREAKING: A Memphis man has been arrested after allegedly scratching off EVERY SINGLE scratch-off ticket at a Germantown Exxon while working the register… because apparently his retirement strategy was “manifesting.”

According to police, 32-year-old Lemonjello Washington decided the Tennessee Lottery was basically a giant reimbursement program. Witnesses say he spent the entire overnight shift scratching tickets like a raccoon that found a Red Bull and a quarter.

The plan? Simple.

Scratch all the tickets.
Use the winning tickets to pay for the losing tickets.
Pocket the profit.
Become Memphis royalty.

Unfortunately, investigators say the math “collapsed almost immediately,” which experts are calling “the most Shelby County Schools thing ever.”

Police say Lemonjello confidently told officers:
“Y’all don’t understand… eventually one of these gone hit.”

Sir. That is not investing. That is emotional support gambling.

Things became suspicious around 3:17 AM when customers walked in asking for scratch-offs and Lemonjello allegedly replied:
“We fresh out… but spiritually we up right now.”

By sunrise, the counter reportedly looked like a confetti cannon exploded inside a bankruptcy hearing. Losing tickets were stacked knee-high. The only big winner was the Exxon trash can.

Authorities say the total losses exceeded several thousand dollars, while total winnings amounted to:
• 3 free tickets
• $11
• and a coupon for a free Mountain Dew.
🤣🤣🤣

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@ComplexMusic Black on Both Sides by Mos Def

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@BenandSkin Eyes as red as the devils dick!! That boy KT high AF!

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@Ken_Rosenthal Such a bowtie bitch that you are.

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@evitaduffy_1 I bet you’re real fucking fun at parties…🙄

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@christianlasval Shut your bitch ass up, fucking Discount Temu Cory Matthews lookin ass.

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@RepMTG Get fucked your fugly bitch.

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@NWSL Don’t call it a comeback…. #CueLLCoolJ

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@JerryMather999 @wfaaweather It’s cause we have the power of God and Anime on our side.

[MrBeast @MrBeast]

I’m gonna give 10 random people that repost this and follow me $25,000 for fun (the $250,000 my X video made)

I’ll pick the winners in 72 hours

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

Two weeks and two days. Shoutout to @KicksDeals for the steal. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[Kicks Deals @KicksDeals]

🚨 $45 OFF 🚨
Great size options for the "Royal Reimagined" Air Jordan 1 Retro High OG are $135 + FREE shipping!

BUY HERE -> https://t.co/ALgqXYrJTG (promotion - use code CYBER at checkout)

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@KicksFinder @key2ursole I’ll get a pair once @kicksdeals sends the discounts

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@laurenboebert Don’t you gotta be out somewhere rubbing someone’s Willy?! GTFOH

[ブランドン @EyeLuvBrandon]

I’ve been laughing at this for 30 minutes! 😂😂😂

[Uncle Daddy Wee-Yum @MrGee54]

A real convo in my house earlier today

Wife: Maaaaan........I dont know why I'm so thirsty this morning

Me: You want me to get you something to drink?

Wife: Shut. The. Fuck. Up.

Me:

[Roy📚 @RoyReadsManga]

Good morning

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

Ayooooo @tom_sachs, y’all sell a patch kit?!?! 😄😄😄

#Wearyourkicks
#

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@MissGinaDarling Ayooooo I hope this lady, her husband, and that wack ass baby the worst mudbutt and when they change that diaper, the get it in their mouth.

[philip lewis @Phil_Lewis_]

A Florida state representative reads “Anita Dick” and “Holden Hiscock” into the record

[Javier Hernandez @itsmejavier]

@UberFacts