Mike Mackey

Comedian / Music Producer / Co-creator of the Orion Project / Trophy Wife

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Nice! https://t.co/47fv2l3RJv

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

I didn't know the little hand on the clock was for hours #MillennialLatenessExcuses

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Are You There U-God? It's Me, Margaret
#HipHopABook

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

The in flux of new grey hairs is very minimal
#FakeParentingFacts

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Rash #RuinABandNameWithOneLetter

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

#IOversleptAnd switched the clocks back an hour

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

The Devil Wears Parka
#MoviesThatAreCold

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

I know what you did last winter
#MoviesThatAreCold

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

He denied the "Elf on the shelf" workers compensation
#FakeSantaFacts

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Due to his unique position, he's a devout flat earther
#FakeSantaFacts

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

@micro_chop Premier, lord finesse, Pete rock, rza

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Flu ends with U
#AntiVaxxingSlogans

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Yuletide Cheers
#HolidaySitcoms

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

@_lola_bee Shark Week

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Harry Potter's scar was an homage to Jaws
#FakeHarryPotterFacts

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Filmed entirely on location in Toronto
#FakeHarryPotterFacts

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Shooting your eye out #EasyWaysToRuinChristmas

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

I thought La La Land was the better movie
#MyDeathbedConfession

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Jeff Bezos #StrangeThingsToFindAtCostco

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

Carts smaller than a mid-sized sedan #StrangeThingsToFindAtCostco

[Mike Mackey @ItsMikeMackey]

@DavidSpade @Uber mimes are in high demand again