Cat🎀

DisBride, DisMom, DisTired ✨

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

“I knew when I met you an adventure was going to happen” 💕👣 2.12.19💕

[Kalon Fullerton @cowlonfull]

Been laughing about this for about 5 consecutive minutes

[Doc Johnson @TheOriginalDoc]

It’s 3am… do you know where your vibrators at?

[Mrs. Rat Maman @mybuddyreynolds]

It should be a rule when you work customer service that if a customer says the bullshittiest bullshit you’ve ever heard you can just punch out

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

@TheSims Bless Bob and Betty Newbie! #HBDSimsGiveaway

[Steph McLaren ™️ ❤️‍🔥 @aboutasteph]

yay the vaccines work

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

@ThatNerdTori The tree is only half decorated. Not a single thing wrapped. Why am I standing over a trash can eating someone else’s anisette cookies at work 👿

[Epiphora @Epiphora]

Looks like Lora Dicarlo, the "sex tech start-up" that vowed to ~revolutionize~ the pleasure industry and pompously acted like the first to ever do so, has gone under. Their site is offline, orders have gone unfulfilled for months, and there are rumors of bankruptcy.

[Justin “Hoops” McElroy @JustinMcElroy]

y'all gotta get yourself a laminator, i'm having the time of my life over here

[Addison Peacock @Addison_Peacock]

The sluttiest thing a man can do is roll up the sleeves of his little button down shirt and show off those forearms

[Courtney Brightside @KikkaVO]

Why do they call them "role players" and not "free-range theater kids"?

[ahmed ali akbar @radbrowndads]

I love wearing white shirts, but I also like turmeric and hot sauce and have no spatial reasoning

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

Why did @Wegmans have to go and change their basting oil recipe? ☹️With Olive Oil allergies in the fam it used to be my go to when it was made with sunflower oil 😔

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

Found a playlist called “songs you forgot about from the 2000s”. I’m sorry but I’m pretty sure it’s just songs from Grey’s Anatomy.

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

We didn’t get the house I’ve been fantasizing about moving into for three weeks. Time to start moping around and deleting my Pinterest board for the house 😔

[Mommeh Dearest @mommeh_dearest]

Me and my 6’4 husband posing for a picture like

[Cat🎀 @itsybitsykitkat]

At least ONCE A WEEK I think about how @ThatNerdTori ’s mom would hide spinach and other leafy greens beneath our pasta.

[Kate Sloan (she/her) @Girly_Juice]

I'm gonna be honest with you, I've never seen a penguin stand like this

[One Awkward Mom @oneawkwardmom]

I gave my child life and he thanks me by trying to poke me in the eyeball with his toe while I drink coffee

[Magic Wand @TrueMagicWand]

Happy #MagicWandDay… and happy birthday to our most beloved #truemagicwand 🎂

We designated Magic Wand Day to celebrate the day Magic Wand launched – May 20, 1968 – a day that set off a cultural sea change around sexuality & pleasure!

Happy birthday to all of us!

#vibratex