Normal people are not up to 10 in Lagos!
Ever since the increase in the price of fuel, I decided to help out in my own way by carrying people for free whenever I’m going to work or coming back, instead of driving alone.
Last year, I bought & kept a cane in my dashboard because of Lagosians, cos normal people in Lagos are few.
I won’t lie, the cane has helped me. I’ve disciplined a few mad people disguised as drivers and corrected some agberos
I prefer cane to koboko or whip. I find it more effective because koboko requires some skill to handle properly, but cane �� even a baby can inflict serious pain
So yesterday morning, I picked up passengers as usual at the crowded bus stop. One student in front, three ladies at the back — all going my way.
The student asked, “How much, sir?”
I told her not to worry, that it was free. They all thanked me, and I smiled.
I was driving peacefully, playing nursery rhymes on Bluetooth. Yes, judge me. After listening to it non-stop because of my baby, I now know Cocomelon songs by heart. I can sing Baby Shark and all Miss Rachel songs
Honestly, I find it therapeutic. My wife and friends laugh at me, but me and “Johny Johny, Yes papa” have built something special.
Next thing one of the ladies at the back said, “Ahh ahn, uncle, why are you listening to nursery rhymes? Are you a baby?”
I smiled. “It’s my baby’s favorite. I enjoy listening to it.”
She said, “No, it’s not good. Change it. I have nice Christian playlist. You should be playing gospel songs, not all these… demonic things that make children addicted.”
The student looked at me, I looked at her and quickly faced front. I was shocked at the audacity.
She repeated it again. “Connect my phone. You will like my songs.”
Another girl at the back even asked her, “Are you okay?”
She ignored her and tapped me again.
“Uncle, connect my phone.”
I ignored her for the third time. Next thing she hissed and left me alone.
Omo. Maybe it’s the song because normally, I’ll park and tell her to Geddifok but I just kept smiling and drove quietly
Usually, I drive to the last bus stop and take a U-turn to my office since it’s not too far, but today I had a meeting and couldn’t risk going all the way.
So I stopped a short distance before the bus stop and pleaded with them to take keke or bike to the bus stop, which wouldn’t cost more than 200, as I had to make a quick turn.
They were very grateful. From where I picked them, it would have cost them like 600 naira
I was about to drive off when I realized one of the ladies hadn’t come down. It was the aunty who asked me to change my music.
I said, “Madam, please come down because I’m turning here.”
She said no, she cannot, that I should have told them I wouldn’t get to the bus stop so they would have entered bus, because it’ll be harder for her to see one from here.
I said, “Madam, are you okay? Just enter keke or bike because I can’t go further than this.”
She said she doesn’t enter bike and I should take her back to where I picked her from because how do I expect her to see bus.
That was when I knew — this is not a normal case.
Without saying a word, I just picked my cane from the dashboard and gave her two lashes on her head…
She was completely shocked. She screamed, jumped out of the car, and started shouting, “Ole! Ole! Ole!”
Next thing, I saw agberos gathering like Avengers and running towards my car.
As she saw them, she escalated it further, shouting, “Kidnapper! Kidnapper!”
I even heard one of them ask, “aunty which one nah, thief abi kidnapper?”
I didn’t wait to find out.
I quickly shut my door and sped off.
As I entered my office compound, my heart was still doing gbim gbim gbim, then I heard a ringtone.
I turned and saw an iPhone 17 on the seat.
The winch had left her phone behind.
I just smiled.
What God cannot do does not exist!
Ajebo Writer
There will be a time in your 20’s and u will meet a Bali man that will teach you how to love your self , it is important to give him a chance n learn those lessons.
Someone asked Nigerians to mention one artist they love — but said they don’t want to hear Davido, Wizkid or Burna Boy 😂
Now the question is… who else are you picking? 👀
Drop your answer below. ⬇️
But we should all agree that dating/marrying broke should never be an option😂if you can find better go for better ladies,if a man has money he will want to naturally spoil you,if he doesn't have money he will call you a gold digger,choose your poison 😂