Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖

Write. Share. Repeat. #vss365 Creativity prose. #iwillwritetoday WIP #thebirdonawire 🐦 Life and technology intersecting (extensively morbid, hopefully alive)

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

It’s dead. The #muse, off life support, dangling, and gasping for breath. Neglect. Malnourishment. Starvation. The plug, pulled. Better to have never written and never shared than to have written and suffer rejection, you think. This truth, a reality. This misery, a life. #vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

I am in my room alone, again. The small window pane a distant looking glass into an unfamiliar and strange world. I am sorry, I feel, but not sure even why existence is available. Waiting for him to arrive home, look down upon my tiny frame and possibly speak #tenderly. #vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

Hello, again, 👋 from the bright recesses of a coffee house corner table. The pen finds the paper like sun finds the face. Warming. Illuminating peaks and valleys of human experience. It's time to dry the eyes from misty mornings and write a little, and, so, live a little too.

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

It arises, both gradually and granularly. Like brown sugar. Clumping in the morning, waiting for the cookies. Except, it's sand littered with shards of glass. Which, imbedding themselves in your feet, create a bloodiness: naive, yet jovial. This depression, a #specter.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

You’d love to keep pushing through, but things just always seem to repeat themselves. Not a broken record, but a set of apartment doors that all look the same. You knock and identical feelings answer the door. Not for lack of trying, but dark dreams are a daily #prison.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

My broken kaleidoscope. Haphazardly held together with tenuous memories, each straining at the corners. Attempting to hold together a recognizable image. In the belly of the darkness, a tarnished patina bursting forth through the fortified brass, somehow, #picturesque.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

You're tired and bare, like the winter branches careening around the old wooden lattice outside the window. That is, single paned and hardly energy efficient like your life as a squirrel scurrying upon each branch hoping for a slight morsel. A fate, intricately #twisted.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

@Write2Fite Appreciate it.

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

The incapacitating anxiety as the debilitating crux of every social interaction represents the most oft visited place in your mind. It’s not a drifting, it’s an abrupt arrival. Coincidently, this is the same mental milieu where sadness becomes life’s inescapable #dogma.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

Social life, looking like another planet. Sometimes, even the market becomes some far off place where human interaction exists and beyond cordial benedictions, the abyss of anxiety is the darkest night you can imagine. Depression, always the imperviously dark #frontier.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

The sink was backing up and clogging, I thought. Like the little wood piles collecting on the shore of the pond. Not inhibiting the water’s movement, just concealing it slightly, per se. Like sadness—blanketing the mind—a pervasive clog creating a persnickety #freedom.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

In a cool, small winter’s evening. Where the blue turns to a soft yellow. The glow falling over the snowy ridge. A view from the rear view mirror reminds me of the pond during summer and light and energy. But depression’s superimposition always giving sadness #credence.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

It would seem that sadnesses grip upon your routine was without a single mercy, except when it was over and you could slog back to the four walls which contained your things. With depression, a home is a place to ooze everywhere and nowhere and life becomes a #fandango.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

The centrifuge of emotion, a swirling dark ocean. Swallowing. Billowing. Cresting and tumultuous. An abyss, unequivocally confirms existence and only that. Beneath a gurgling surface, torpedos launch—uneventfully—and detonation within the heart turns water #vermillion.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

I didn’t want to put it in my report, but he left me no choice. He died because he was blinded by his wanton emotions. He wasn’t able to see what everyone else could, but that’s life: having dumb luck and sometimes walking off a cliff. Yes, he was completely #moonstruck.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you, but the thought of keeping you was also a heavy bear. Although, at times, while the frozen air stifled my lungs I thought: this was really living. But I knew, with you, to live, was to exist in all manner of #discombobulation.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

Depression is all the pin pricks during your day, which equate to cannonball wounds. Sensations of inner death, a peculiar type of duress. Defying logic, surpassing rationality, and without those, the risk is lunatic behavior, but—for happiness—I can’t help but #clamor.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

Black crows voice their opinions outdoors. The tile in the bathroom shower isn’t memorable and neither would be blood, should it mingle. Depression is living in the cold—sometimes adjusting—usually not. Hot coffee melts the mental brokenness. Set loose an icy #shipwreck.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

He wore well everything that made him—a tattered frame, hanging, often dragging about with unresolved mental loose ends—and, realizing most of the darkness would trail behind like the static morning fog from the frequented local pond, he embraced a sadness, #exquisite.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

Depression is comprised of all the little mind inventions that go tinkering about to and fro. Mincing. Yonder and hither, they slowly morph into some large diseased premonition, like a black piano falling out of the clear blue sky. Some unbeknownst superficial #wrath.

#vss365

[Jonathan L. Phillips ✏️ ☕️ 📖 @iwillwritetoday]

@sarahsundin Hi there. 👋 Sounds great. Same
Here!