hmm

professional apple eater

[hmm @izardman]

your passionfruit is whatever fruit you like the most

[hmm @izardman]

“frank sinatra was born just to proselytize about lady gaga”

[Thomas O’Donnell @belovedofthesky]

Phil Wizard on Hot Ones West Coast

[hmm @izardman]

rip eleanor roosevelt, you would have loved chappell roan

[hmm @izardman]

tom and i share one brain cell and today it produced the thought “what if nachos”

[hmm @izardman]

really excited to announce I have figured out how to articulate my feelings re: my upstairs neighbours: i feel so bad for them because they are very uncool

[hmm @izardman]

just to hang out. huge improvement from my robbery anxiety dreams

[hmm @izardman]

dreamed last night that ricky montgomery broke into my house

[hmm @izardman]

💖gorgonzola 🥰

[hmm @izardman]

every club should hire someone whose job is exclusively spin n span specs

[hmm @izardman]

have become soo anti fedex recently

[hmm @izardman]

@GoCarla With me!!! With blackberries

[Thomas O’Donnell @belovedofthesky]

"This hamster might.......... be immortal"

[hmm @izardman]

“if I could time travel I'd literally be like, orson welles groupie”

[hmm @izardman]

i loveee science but sometimes just would like to play neopets all day

[hmm @izardman]

in my incel fuckboy era (doing a 4 minute plank at the beach to impress a girl who has a boyfriend)

[hmm @izardman]

really thinking about the sun

[hmm @izardman]

new obsession is staring at the sun

[hmm @izardman]

sorry no, not “have you heard this fact that babies are soft”

[hmm @izardman]

@belovedofthesky @GoCarla Carla quote is the original but netanya and i (correctly) recognized that it wouldnt translate well to twitter

[hmm @izardman]

“babe are you ok? you’ve barely touched your two strawberries”