Jack Bauer

I'm a retired civil servant, and grandfather. I enjoy travel to exotic locations, painting, martial arts, and puzzles. I can also get blood from a stone.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I have to be honest. I think the writers have jumped the shark with this season's 24. #Inauguration

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I have to be honest. I'm not a fan of this new Goth Chloe. I normally shoot Emo kids. #24LAD

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I said "DAMMIT", dammit. #24

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I'm back. And this time I have Obamacare. #24

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

May 5 2014. It’s on. #24

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

Ok, Tea Party. I've had enough. You are all now clear and present threat to the US.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

If you think I'm pissed about the #shutdown, you should see the team of Federal workers who spray on John Boehner's tan.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I better be getting paid. Boehner, do you hear me? I said I better be getting paid.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

Attention Tea Bagger Republicans: If you shut down the government with this attempt to kill Obamacare and I don't get paid, expect a visit.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I can now announce to the world that Jesse Pinkman will be my new wingman. #BreakingBad

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

Ah, the old ricin in the tea gag. #BreakingBad

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

There's no way Walter White comes out of this alive. Trust me. #BreakingBad

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

Yes, I arrive and sort all this shit out. #BreakingBad #Spoiler

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

I'm federal agent Jack Bauer. Today is going to be the longest day in my life. Except for the other 8 ones.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

Copy that. #24

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

While you're celebrating, have a read about why @RealAlexJones is an ass clown. http://t.co/Jlg23eSp8O

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

@RealAlexJones You think American servicemen did this to fellow Americans? You're a petty ass clown with an inferiority complex. Go away.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

You're welcome, Mr. President.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

The following takes place between 9:00pm and 10:00pm.

[Jack Bauer @j_bauer]

Road trip: Guantanamo.