jacob dethloff

“Aargh” - Tusken Raiders

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

High school linemen at the end of the conversation while at dinner. “Alright, I’m eating”

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“Who gets the D&D campaign in the divorce?” - Aldi’s shelf stocker

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“Wearing a white shirt to a BBQ, one day he will learn” - HDR engineer

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“I’ve roofied myself to see if I’d black out. I remembered everything so I’ll never have to worry” -awkward engineer student peer

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“I drove into this town, and I understand suicide” - coworker

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

@NxtDeterio https://t.co/bac36i7yRz

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“You could wrap a piece of meat around her neck and the dog still wouldn’t play with her” coworker describing how ugly she was

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“You have a face for podcasting” -random radio station in Montana

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

@vodk_anon Civ 6 shit right here

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

@KirkCousins8 Definitely the lost city of Atlantis

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

“That man’s kids are so lazy they would shit in their bed and kick it to the end” - mid 50s marine buddy

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

@wildezofficial @stankRat_ is this you?

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

A girl said I have nice thighs today. I have peaked, can’t go any higher from that.

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

@coachsurf_68 Now a sailboat hanging from the ceiling!

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

You’re welcome San Diego 😘😘

[Fox News @FoxNews]

Winter storm shuts down Portland, hammers Midwest; San Diego hit with first-ever blizzard warning https://t.co/E7ocHuBHLI

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

Meet a guy named Tommy G in San Diego. He was one of princes best friends and proved it with photos. Sorry gressel, you got one upped.

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

@zach_engen Only if the terrain has more tec

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

Some girl at a Random California bar- “hi, my names lashes, but my real name is Elizabeth” ooookkkkk

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

Jumps in the ocean for the 1st time. Gets stabbed immediately….

[jacob dethloff @jacob_dethloff]

Me - damn near sleeping. (10pm) Dad - “son, we got to make pickles”