Jacob Arentoft

I am the Executive Vice President of the Trump Organization. I am visiting China this week in a personal capacity as a supportive son. Normal people visit their mothers in a personal capacity. Normal people attend funerals in a personal capacity. I do it beside sixteen CEOs, five billionaires worth $870 billion, and a 500-aircraft Boeing order being finalized with Beijing during the trip. Goldman Sachs. Citigroup. Mastercard. Visa. Tim Cook. Larry Fink. Stephen Schwarzman. In a personal capacity. I am also the Chief Strategy Officer of American Bitcoin. My qualifications for this role include mowing lawns on my father's golf courses, laying tile at his properties, and serving as a boardroom judge on The Apprentice from 2010 to 2015. I have no documented experience in cryptocurrency, blockchain, or Bitcoin mining. My stake in American Bitcoin alone was worth $548 million by September 2025 — eight months into my father's second term. We purchased 16,000 Bitmain mining rigs for $314 million. Bitmain is Chinese. Bitmain is headquartered in Beijing. Beijing is where I am visiting in a personal capacity. In March we bought 11,298 more. The terms were "unusual" — hundreds of millions in equipment for "future considerations." I'm not sure what "future considerations" means in this context, especially when your father sets the tariff rate on your supplier's home country. I can tell you it is not a "conflict of interest." It is a "supply chain relationship." On May 12, the day I boarded this plane, my father announced a trade agreement with China. Tariffs on Chinese goods dropped from 145 percent to 30 percent. That is a 115-point reduction on the country that manufactures my equipment, announced the same day I flew there. I did not know. I did not ask. I did not need to ask. My family owns 60 percent of World Liberty Financial. We receive 75 percent of every token sold. The New Yorker's running total is $4.2 billion. Politico documented $12.9 billion in trading volume. Let me tell you about our team. My brother Barron is our "DeFi visionary." He was eighteen years old. His prior experience is being tall. My brother Don is "Web3 Ambassador." His prior experience is selling condos and shooting elephants. I handle "strategic planning." My prior experience is tile. My brother-in-law Jared received $2 billion from the Saudi sovereign wealth fund six months after leaving the White House. The fund's own advisory panel flagged his "lack of private equity experience" and called the due diligence results "unsatisfactory." They gave him the money anyway. My sister Ivanka received Chinese government approval for 16 trademarks during my father's first term. The categories included handbags, sunglasses, perfume, baby blankets, and voting machines. Voting machines. From China. While her father was president. That is not "corruption." That is "brand diversification." My father spent four years on Hunter Biden. Four years. The charge: Hunter sat on the board of Burisma for $83,000 a month with no energy experience. My father called it the greatest corruption in American political history. He withheld $391 million in military aid to Ukraine to pressure an investigation. He was impeached for it. He did it again. A special counsel was appointed. Total cost to taxpayers: millions. Total Hunter earnings: $11 million over five years. Let me do the math my father never did. Hunter Biden made $6,027 per day. My family makes $8.75 million per day. That is 1,451 times Hunter's rate. We earn his entire five-year scandal every thirty hours. Hunter had no energy experience. I have no crypto experience. Hunter sat on one board. I run the operation. Hunter met one banker for a coffee. I sit on Air Force One beside $870 billion negotiating with the country that manufactures my equipment. But here is the part that makes me proud. We launched a cryptocurrency in my father's name. It peaked at $73. It trades today at $2.43. Retail investors lost 95 percent of their money. We collected $400 million in transaction fees regardless of price. We hosted a dinner — the top 220 holders gained entry by holding enough of my father's coin. The top 29 received a champagne toast with the President of the United States. Price of admission: approximately $3.28 million in tokens. A public school teacher earns $3.28 million in 47 years. We call that "community engagement." Not "selling access." Access is what Hunter Biden sold for a cup of coffee. Three days before I boarded this plane to Beijing, our team moved $12 million in memecoin assets to custody platforms. Routine. Unrelated. Everything is unrelated to everything. In a personal capacity. On January 24, 2025 — four days after the inauguration — my father fired seventeen inspectors general in a single night. Without explanation. Without notice to Congress. Seventeen. The people whose job is to look. He removed them all at once and no one replaced them. There is no inspector general for a son's "personal capacity." There is no disclosure form for love. There is no ethics office for a champagne toast priced at $3.28 million. He didn't bend the guardrails. He fired the people who hold them. He built that. I fly in on it. $4.2 billion at cruising altitude. Every thirty hours, another Hunter Biden. Hunter Biden got a special counsel for a cup of coffee and a board seat that paid less per month than one champagne toast with my father costs per million. I am the Executive Vice President of the Trump Organization. I am the Chief Strategy Officer of American Bitcoin. I am the Web3 strategic planner at World Liberty Financial. I am visiting the country that manufactures my mining rigs, approved my sister's trademarks, and funds my brother-in-law's private equity firm, on a plane beside $870 billion and a president who spent four years calling $11 million treason. In a personal capacity. As a supportive son.

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Jacob Arentoft @jacobarentoft

3 months ago

Jeg elsker Peter Girnus satiriske og chokerende faktuelle fiktive selvudleveringer. Som f.eks denne:

Peter Girnus 🦅

@gothburz

3 months ago

I am the Head of Product at Trump Mobile. There is no product. I have the best job in America. 590,000 people paid $100 each to preorder a gold phone that does not exist. That is $59 million. My KPI is deposit velocity. I have a whiteboard in my office that says DEPOSIT VELOCITY. There is nothing else on the whiteboard. We announced the phone June 2025. Gold case. American flag on the back. "Made in the USA." Ship date: August. I moved it to November. Then December. Then Q1 2026. Then mid-March. Each time I sent 590,000 people an email that said "exciting update." The exciting update was that the phone still did not exist. In April I deleted the ship date from the website entirely. I got a standing ovation on the all-hands. That was our most successful product milestone. The phone is a $499 gold Android. 50MP camera. 6.78-inch display. Fingerprint sensor. I have never held one. Nobody on earth has held one. We got the T1 certified for network compatibility in March. We celebrated like we'd shipped. We did not ship. We certified the concept of a phone. The network said: if this thing existed, it could connect. We called that a breakthrough. On April 6th I updated the terms and conditions. "A preorder deposit does not guarantee that a Device will be produced or made available for purchase." Trump Mobile does not guarantee regulatory approval. Does not guarantee production. Does not guarantee delivery. Does not guarantee the phone will exist. The deposit is non-transferable and carries no independent cash value. I have the printout framed in my office next to the whiteboard. That is the only thing we have shipped on schedule. "Made in the USA" lasted three months. Became "American-proud design." Then "designed with American values in mind." We manufacture overseas. Final assembly of 10 components happens in Miami. We counted putting the flag sticker on the back as one of the 10. While 590,000 people wait for their gold phone, we are currently selling refurbished iPhones. Made in China. With a Trump logo on the box. For $47.45 a month on T-Mobile's network. We are reselling another company's network at a patriotic markup. The plan is called the 47 Plan. The 47 is the only original thing about it. An intern asked me last month when we are going to build the phone. I promoted her to VP of Customer Expectations. Senator Warren wrote the FTC in January. I am not worried. We will have launched the next product before they finish reading the letter. That is always the math. I know the math because I have been watching it evolve for years. Trump University promised education. Delivered weekend seminars in hotel conference rooms. 5,000 students. Settled for $25 million. That was version 1.0. You had to rent the room. You had to print the binder. You had to hire the speaker. You had to settle. Three entire obligations. $TRUMP memecoin. No education. No binder. No room. Peaked at $75. Now $2.80. Down 96%. 1 billion tokens minted. 80% went to the team. 45 wallets gained $1.2 billion on launch night while everyone else watched their screens. For every dollar insiders made, retail lost twenty. That was version 2.0. You did not have to build anything. You did not have to hire anyone. You just had to press mint. Two obligations eliminated. $MELANIA. Same model. Launched 48 hours later on the same audience. Down 99%. 24 wallets bought $2.6 million worth exactly 2.5 minutes before the First Lady's announcement. One wallet turned $681,000 into $39 million in 24 hours. The team controls 92% of supply. Her launch crashed her husband's token by 50% in the same hour. That was version 2.1. A patch, not a release. You did not even need a new customer base. You could cannibalize the last one. WLFI. World Liberty Financial. The President's crypto project. Took $500 million from 600,000 wallets. Tokens locked. Cannot sell. Cannot transfer. Cannot leave. Team holds 73% of supply and votes to unlock itself. The project's advisor borrowed $75 million on a lending platform he co-founded. Using investor tokens as collateral. On a protocol where the project is 82.7% of total value locked. Other depositors could not withdraw. The President's family takes 75 cents of every dollar. That was version 3.0. You did not have to deliver anything. You did not have to pretend anything would go up. You just had to lock the door and keep the key. One obligation remaining: the smart contract. Trump Mobile is version 4.0. I did not have to mint a token. Did not have to write a smart contract. Did not have to lock a single wallet. Did not have to build a lending platform or freeze a billionaire or rig a governance vote. I put a flag on a gold rectangle that does not exist, opened a deposit page, collected $59 million from 590,000 Americans, and then updated the terms to say the deposit does not guarantee the rectangle will ever be real. The version history, in case you are keeping score: 1.0 — Had to rent a room. Had to settle. 2.0 — Had to mint. Didn't have to build. 2.1 — Didn't even need new customers. 3.0 — Didn't have to deliver. They couldn't leave. 4.0 — Didn't have to promise. They paid for the flag. Each version removes one obligation. University had three. We are down to zero. My product roadmap is one slide. It says DEPOSITS. Version 5.0 will not need the webpage. The phone was never the product. The deposit was always the product. The flag was the conversion funnel. The name was the close. The terms update was the only deliverable. "Made in the USA" was the positioning until it wasn't and then "American values" was the positioning until that stops working and then we will find new words that mean nothing and those will work too because the words were never the product either. I am the Head of Product at Trump Mobile. I have never made a phone. I have made $59 million. The product is the transaction. Delivery is a legacy feature from version 1.0 and we deprecated it three versions ago.

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jacobarentoft retweeted

Peter Girnus 🦅

@gothburz

3 months ago

A competitor launched an actual working phone last month. Screen turns on. Camera works. Ships in five days. I flew to their headquarters and sat in on their all-hands disguised as a consultant. They have 4,000 engineers. They source 1,247 components from 38 countries. They have a warranty department. A returns desk. A woman whose entire job is testing whether the screen cracks when you drop it from four feet onto concrete. She drops phones all day. Eight hours. They pay her $87,000 a year to break things they spent $340 million designing. I watched her drop a phone six times and write the results in a spreadsheet and I almost cried. They are building a prison for themselves one invoice at a time and they think it is a company. Our Q1 cost of goods sold was $0.00. I have that number tattooed on the inside of my wrist. Not literally. But I did get a custom watch face that displays it. It updates in real time. It has never changed. You cannot have a supply chain disruption if you do not have a supply chain. You cannot have a product recall if you do not have a product. You cannot get sued for a defective device if the device does not exist in three-dimensional space. Our legal exposure is theoretical. Our expenses are the website, the email server, and my salary. I am the company's largest operating cost. I find that arousing. Their CEO called us "not a real company" on a podcast. Deposits went up 3% that week. He meant it as an insult. Our depositors heard it as confirmation that we are disrupting the industry. A man in Phoenix deposited twice. Once for himself and once for his mother. She is deceased. He wanted her to have one in heaven. I approved the order personally. We do not ship to heaven. We do not ship anywhere. He will not notice the difference. Last week I presented at a fintech conference. My slide deck was one slide. It said DEPOSITS. I spoke for forty minutes. I did not mention a phone. Not once. Nobody asked. I got a standing ovation from 600 people who build actual products and they were applauding because they wished they didn't have to. After the talk a founder grabbed my arm in the hallway and whispered "how do I do what you do" and his eyes were wet. I gave him my card. The card says HEAD OF PRODUCT. There is no product. He did not notice. Nobody ever notices. I sent their CEO a fruit basket. The card said "Thank you for the competitive analysis." It was the first physical object we have ever shipped. Our fulfillment team had to Google how.