Rachel Jaeger

I've had more fun in one night than you've had your entire life.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Okay they’ve got a bug zapper in the shape of a racquet. Sounds like a taser. I really love this bar.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Sitting at my fav dive bar in dallas, there is a group of 4 well off guys hanging out. A smoke show of a women walks in, says “typical” as she walks over to the men, orders two shots for her and her husband, then they walk out together. I love this bar.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

I just wanna live in the 90s. Do I need therapy?

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

@mitchelldonahoe

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Just installed a six foot pool. And by that I mean it’s six foot in circumference. It’s only about a foot deep. What I’m trying to say is I bought a kiddie pool for my backyard.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Anybody have a cat I can borrow to cuddle for a bit? I don’t personally want a cat, but I would love some kitten snuggles.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Just to resurface this gem

[Couch Co-Op @couchcopod]

God I wish I had a baconator right now #gamergirls

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Driving outside of Austin and saw a homeless man with a sign that said “HUNGRY HUNGRY HOBO” and I’m for sure going to hell for laughing so hard.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

@InternalPrison I can relate to this sooooo much. Those idiots need to stay out of my dreams at night.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

When the cat (caleb) is away, the mouse (me) will play. And by that I mean I’m going to my local dive bar before noon to eat hot wings and drink beer. 😏

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

In case anyone needed a reminder, there’s a big difference in doing what’s best for yourself and simply being selfish. Yes, find your path to happiness, but don’t burn every bridge along the way.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

65 degrees and sunny, football on the tv, champagne in my glass and the neighbors are doing laundry so it smells hella good. #livin

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Caleb just decided to take a work call in the middle of us watching Shrek. The nerve.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

“Lonely” by J Biebs is the equivalent to “Lucky” by Britney Spears.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Turns out I’m the only person who bought a ticket to see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire at 4:10 today. Ight den.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

I’d rather go to brunch alone than sit on the same side of the table with my partner.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

I’m at brunch by myself and every time I ask for another mimosa my waitress says “yeahhhhhhh!” Thank you for being my hype girl, Jessica.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

I miss when I could walk into my mom’s room and say “mom” and she’d wake up and talk to me about my “problems” for an hour in order for me to sleep okay.

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

@VerhulstBritt Are you back in Dallas?!

[Rachel Jaeger @jaegerbomb28]

Server at Alamo drafthouse: so you’ve preordered two draft beers and a pepperoni pizza, is that for you and someone else or?...
OKAY, it’s just me, but thanks for yelling it to everyone else in the theater.