waver 🪽

✦ genshin ar 60 ⟡ 27 ✦ enha 10.11.22. ⟡ dreamies 09.19.24. ✦ girlfriend haver era 03.04.23. ended ⁀➷ 12.22.25 fiancée haver era ⟡

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

.・。.・ 🤍 ✭・.・✫・゜🦢・。. 🪽

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

@pshd3vil

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

this is sending me 😭

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

god i wish i was a cute girlie that carried a purse but i am in fact the opposite

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

my room looks busted as hell right now

[ceren🪽 @heamseung]

As someone who worked on cancer-related projects throughout high school and now regularly volunteers at my university, visiting children and adults undergoing chemotherapy, I honestly cannot put into words how deeply this broke my heart and how much more admiration I feel for Heeseung after hearing his story.

Chemotherapy is an incredibly exhausting process even for adults. When you see children going through it, you understand even more clearly just how much it asks of such small, fragile bodies. But there is something I have noticed while spending time with children undergoing treatment that has always stayed with me: there is an indescribably innocent kind of hope in their eyes.

Despite everything they are going through, the light in the dreams they hold onto never seems to disappear.

And that takes an incredible amount of strength.

Cancer treatment is not only about medication, procedures, and physical pain. It asks you to keep believing when everything around you gives you reasons to lose hope. It asks you to remain psychologically strong while putting you through some of the most cruel circumstances imaginable.

You may watch the friends you met in the hospital pass away. You may see your parents cry again and again because they are terrified of losing you. Sometimes, you may even see the uncertainty and helplessness in the eyes of the doctors and nurses treating you.

And despite all of that, you are still expected to keep hoping.

That is why hearing Heeseung talk about his childhood hits me so deeply.

He survived something that could have taken away not only his health, but also the dreams he had carried since he was six years old. And yet, even in the middle of treatment, he was playing guitar and hosting talent shows for other patients. He was still finding ways to bring something to life in a place surrounded by so much fear and uncertainty.

The fact that he made it through that experience and grew into someone who now wants to give comfort to the people listening to his music, who wants to make others feel better, and who holds such a deep love for freedom is genuinely awe-inspiring to me.

Because when I look at Heeseung today, I don't think we are simply looking at a 24-year-old adult.

I think we are also looking at the little boy who once desperately wanted to live, wanted to go home, and somehow found the strength to keep going.

A little boy who survived.

A little boy who grew up to become the hero of his own story.

And perhaps that is one of the most beautiful things about him: the child who once fought so hard simply to stay alive is now living the life he fought for and using his voice, his music, and his freedom to bring light to others.

I don't think I could ever admire him enough for that.

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

got majority of my stuff out of my room 🤪some things i can’t get out so my dad’s just gonna have to deal

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

all i do is cause problems

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

i should just die

[nes @evanxiz]

i’m so glad he is not ashamed to be healing his innerchild with toy story, trinkets and such, he didn’t have time to be like other kids : (

[♡ em misses evan ♡ @evanleeangel]

i can’t properly explain with words how much i love EVAN. i truly have never felt so much love for an idol in my entire life. i’m so incredibly proud of him. he’s so strong and went through something no one should have to and at such a young age. i’m truly so lucky to be an EVER.

[About Music @AboutMusicYT]

Evan talks about being diagnosed with cancer when he was younger:

"The treatment process wasn’t easy, but when I saw how my mom took care of me nonstop, I wanted to put on a brave face for her. When the hospital held events like talent shows for the patients, I’d play guitar and even host them.

I dreamed of being a singer ever since I was six, but to be honest, back then I didn’t really have the mental bandwidth to even think about that. I’d watch my friends pass away and kept thinking, “I want to live so badly, I want to go home.”

Thankfully I made it through treatment and got to go on with my life, but fitting back in with my friends wasn’t easy.

I had a lot less energy, and since my hair was still growing back from chemo, I got teased a lot for it. My friends would be like, “What is that, grass? You’re like a monk.” But I just took it because I wanted to fit in. Once I got to middle school, I had some good friends, but I wasn’t as outgoing as before.

I became more of an introvert. I haven’t thought about that in a long time. It hurts to bring it back up."

[erin @oconist]

really recontextualizes a lot of his career decisions. you can’t live for others when you’ve experienced first hand how limited your time on earth is. even when those others are fans or group mates who believe he owes them loyalty. while other idols might stay around in a group while unhappy for years, he had to go his own way. kpop is often a two way parasocial street and i’m glad he hasn’t fallen victim to it.

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

@reilogys the only time you mention my existence…

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

and we wonder why people are depressed and suicidal. yall like to laugh at things people are happy or content with

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

i’m so upset about the hair thing with my coworker. i lowkey want to cry

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

@pshd3vil kill me please. i volunteer as tribute

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

yall why my coworker laughing at my hair :((

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

@estrogenwon 🥹🥹

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

took my hair down bc yeahhh

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

yall why my coworker laughing at my hair :((

[waver 🪽 @jakeheevan]

i just wanted to wear pigtails :(