Buttsneeze

he/him Singer, actor, writer, liar. “Oregon Zoo otter, known for slam dunking and self-pleasuring, dies at age 20”

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

"Linda, eat a snickers, you're not you when you're hungry" Tom says to a squirrel in hopes of getting his divorced wife back.

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

*looking both ways before merging out of the f1 pit stop

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

“Where’d this asshole learn how to drive?” I mutter as I get cut off in the f1 race, finishing in last place

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

*turning on my turn signal as I race for 17th place in the F1 Race

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

Everything reminds me of her #murderdrones #glitchproduction #cyn #null

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

@shenanigansen Iirc, 50% of good/enjoyable voice acting is literally having fun with playing pretend, so if vocaloid ends up being a wash, maybe give it a shot and voice some stuff yourself without thinking about result and just having fun saying the lines!

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

*literally anyone dies

Me: lucky motherfucker

[artof666k @666KArt]

Hello. #ArtistOnTwitter

[zac @meltycanon]

aint no way

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

@MayceKeeler Hahahaha

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Vacationing Detective Just Going To Pretend Like He Didn't Even See Dead Body In The Woods https://t.co/Igq3WHybas

[The Onion @TheOnion]

Report: 1 In 5 Air Ducts Contains Person Looking, Listening In On You https://t.co/Hrp39dnOWU

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

@MayceKeeler Does this include my dad?

[cory @coolmathgame_]

i did it. i pretended that air planes in the night sky were like shooting stars and it was fucking insane

[A. Bonkdóttir, Ar.T @TheBonkQueen]

RIP to everyone killed by the gods for their hubris but I'm different. and better. maybe even better than the gods

[Buttsneeze @JAlex_P]

@nollange_ And run them some coffee from the place across the other side of town and then assist in some projects for “test trial” to see if you fit in and then get them a pipe and slippers and then lock up for the night and then cover for night security/janitor and then get rejected.

[The Onion @TheOnion]

‘No Way To Prevent This,’ Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens https://t.co/QENqYuJHKP

[Discursive anomalies, esq @sargoth]

*standing in direct sunlight taking 2 damage a second*
augh eurgh ugh augh augh ugh eurgh ohhg