You all know the legend of Italian nutcase Mario Balotelli. From lobbing darts at teammates to burning his own house down, the striker wreaks havoc wherever he goes.
But you haven't heard it all.
Buckle in for a full, manic rundown of Mario's truly chaotic career...
I just remembered the time I went on a first date to London Zoo and at the gate he asked if I would mind paying for my own ticket, which I said I would, at which point he pulled out a 2-for-1 voucher, so I paid for my ticket and he went in for free.