jarby

shit. I’m him

[jarby @jarby94]

This pride month, curb your homophobia. Whack off a gay friend

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[jarby @jarby94]

@Bgr_Kanye Homage

[jarby @jarby94]

@Thechat101 Wtf are you idiots talking about

[jarby @jarby94]

@mfdoomstan1

[jarby @jarby94]

@KillaKreww They don’t make them like Norm Macdonald anymore!

[jarby @jarby94]

@KillaKreww They don’t make them like Norm Macdonald anymore!

[jarby @jarby94]

@MIDWESTJD Yup

[jarby @jarby94]

@EthnicAmerican0 @roywoodjr Worked at Howies all four years of high school. Why are you making shit up?

[jarby @jarby94]

@EthnicAmerican0 @roywoodjr “Teflon that flakes”

[jarby @jarby94]

@EthnicAmerican0 @roywoodjr Worked at Howies all four years of high school. Why are you making shit up?

[jarby @jarby94]

@musicradarHQ List ass

[jarby @jarby94]

@stoolgambling Should’ve let Shane beat his ass

[jarby @jarby94]

@stoolgambling Che is an idiot

[jarby @jarby94]

@the_det_times Wow and Sexy Red!

[jarby @jarby94]

@pqdres @ryanoflan

[Jasiah Jervis @Jasiah_Jervis]

See y’all soon East Lansing 💚

[Tone Digs @ToneDigz]

I-right wiggle 34 switchblade. For the state championship. I love all y’all baby, I love all y’all.

[Mike Beauvais @MikeBeauvais]

LOOPER (2012), Dir. Rian Johnson

[FanDuel Sportsbook @FDSportsbook]

21 years ago today 🗓️

Kentucky vs. Michigan State was cinema 🍿

[jarby @jarby94]

@DARK_AGE_RAGE @TJLang70 Might want to look up what “witness” means dumbass

[jarby @jarby94]

@Thechat101 Ak is so stupid🤦‍♂️