To @lotussmalaysia , I really hope this gets your attention. (LOTUS’S SELAYANG)
Today was supposed to be a normal grocery shopping trip with my wife, who is currently 38 weeks pregnant and could give birth at any time.
Instead, it turned into one of the most humiliating experiences we’ve ever had.
After we finished paying for our groceries, this staff member stopped us right outside the cashier.
Without introducing himself or explaining the situation properly, he looked at my wife and asked:
“Akak simpan barang apa tu dalam perut?”
Imagine hearing those words directed at your wife, who is heavily pregnant.
I was shocked. I immediately asked him, “Barang apa yang wife saya curi? Siapa yang nampak?”
Instead of showing any evidence, he said they wanted my wife’s Buku Pink as proof that she was pregnant.
That wasn’t enough.
They also wanted my wife to show her stomach to prove she wasn’t hiding stolen items.
Let that sink in.
A woman who is 38 weeks pregnant was being asked to prove her pregnancy because someone thought her baby bump looked suspicious.
At that moment, I completely lost my patience.
I told them if they were accusing someone of stealing, then they needed to provide proof, produce the witness, and call the supervisor immediately.
Instead, we were made to stand there for almost 20 minutes, surrounded by other shoppers, while they tried contacting their supervisor.
My wife was already exhausted from carrying our baby, and now she had to endure public embarrassment on top of that.
When the supervisor finally arrived, I insisted that the cashier who made the accusation come forward.
When I asked her directly:
“Bila awak nampak isteri saya ambil barang?”
Her answer shocked me.
She admitted she never actually saw my wife taking anything.
Her suspicion was simply because my wife’s stomach “didn’t look like a pregnant belly” and she thought it looked like someone hiding merchandise.
So there was no witness. No evidence. No stolen item. Only an assumption.
Eventually, she apologised to my wife.
The male staff member who confronted us remained silent until I took a step forward to punch him. Only then did he apologise.
Honestly, this isn’t even about the apology anymore.
It’s about the way my wife was treated.
She is carrying our first child. She is due to deliver any day now.
Throughout this pregnancy, I’ve done everything I can to protect her, reduce her stress, and make sure she’s comfortable.
Then, in a matter of minutes, two staff members made her feel like a criminal based solely on the appearance of her pregnant belly.
No pregnant woman deserves to go through this.
No customer should be publicly accused without evidence.
If you genuinely suspect theft, follow proper procedures professionally.
Don’t make assumptions.
Don’t ask a pregnant woman to expose her stomach.
Don’t ask for her medical records to prove she’s pregnant.
And definitely don’t embarrass innocent customers in front of everyone.
I sincerely hope Lotus’s looks into this incident seriously. This isn’t just about us.
It’s about making sure no other pregnant mother has to experience the same humiliation.
Please do better.
To that guy yang confront us in the beginning, I’d say it was your lucky day because the only reason I tak tumbuk you was to avoid any violence in front of my wife.
And for you cashier lady, why kau tak jadi doktor je?
Macam mana ek? Benda dah terlajak 8 tahun. Kalau tak payah tanggung aku dgn budak ni mesti banyak dah duit dia. Boleh dia spend macam2 untuk diri sendiri.
Sometimes male anger at “women getting special treatment” reminds me of a gorilla experiment. One gorilla gets a banana every hour. The females next to him get one every four hours. Then someone decides to be fairer and gives the females a banana every two hours instead. The original gorilla? He flips out. He's still getting his banana every hour, but it feels like a loss because his advantage shrank. That's how a lot of men react to basic fairness for women: not as justice, but as theft.
Waalaikumussalam
Bermusafir untuk tujuan healing, merawat jiwa, tenangkan fikiran dan seumpamanya dibenarkan untuk jamak qasar kerana tidak termasuk dalam permusafiran yang tujuan sia-sia tanpa tujuan (Tanazzuh).
Tanazzuh (sekadar bersiar-siar) di sisi mazhab al-Shafi’i tidak mendapatkan rukhsah qasar; kerana dikira perbuatan yang sia-sia dan membuang masa.
أما المسافر للتنزه.. فمذهبنا لا يبيح له القصر، و أعتقد أنهم يعدّونه من اللهو و ضياع الوقت
Adapun jikalau kerana bersiar-siar dengan tujuan menghilangkan sakit (healing) dan stress, maka diharuskan qasar.
Lihat Syarah Mukhtasār Latif, Dr Labib Najib:
فالمسافر لأجل رؤية البلاد ليس له القصر أما إذا كان للتنزه لإزالة مرض و نحوه - و لو لم يخبره طبيب - فله الترخص لأنه غرض صحيح