Jason Goodall

[Jason Goodall @jasondgoodall]

Absolute legend

[🇺🇸 🦅Simple Man 🦅🇺🇸 @Soaringeagle45]

Worth the read! 🤣😂

A man known locally as "Hushpuppy Hank" was arrested Tuesday night after allegedly refusing to leave Captain King's Seafood City for nearly eleven hours, insisting he had not yet reached what he described as "optimal buffet performance."

According to restaurant employees, 44-year-old Hank "Hushpuppy Hank" Williams arrived shortly after noon carrying a notebook, two pens, and the confidence of a man who had absolutely no plans for the remainder of the day.

Staff say he purchased a buffet ticket at 12:07 PM and immediately began what witnesses later described as "an endurance event disguised as lunch."

Employees became concerned when Hank started referring to each trip to the buffet as a "round."

"He kept announcing things like, 'Round Seven is underway,'" said one customer. "At first we thought he was joking. By Round Fifteen, nobody was laughing."

Witnesses claim Hank spent the afternoon rotating between the crab legs, fried catfish, popcorn shrimp, and dessert stations while taking strategic hydration breaks and occasionally pacing the dining room to "increase storage capacity."

Several customers reported seeing him ranking menu items in a notebook.

The hushpuppies reportedly received a perfect score and were later described by Hank as "the Michael Jordan of side dishes."

At approximately 6:45 PM, employees say Hank informed nearby diners that he was entering what he called "The Championship Rounds."

By 8:00 PM, staff noticed he had become emotionally attached to a section of the buffet and was referring to it as "my territory."

When management announced the restaurant would be closing, witnesses say Hank looked genuinely confused.

"He asked if the restaurant was closing permanently or just for the evening," said one manager.

After learning it was the latter, Hank allegedly requested permission to remain overnight and promised to "stay out of everybody's way."

Management declined.

Police were called after multiple requests for him to leave were ignored.

According to officers, Hank argued that an all-you-can-eat buffet should remain open until customers voluntarily admit defeat.

"He told us he was pacing himself," one officer reported. "Then he asked if we had any idea how many shrimp were left."

As officers escorted him from the restaurant, Hank reportedly turned toward the buffet, placed his hand over his heart, and delivered one final statement.

"Eleven hours isn't overeating," he said.

"It's commitment."

Captain King's Seafood City reopened Wednesday morning after employees completed what management described as "an extensive emotional recovery process."

Cliff Messer

[🇺🇸 🦅Simple Man 🦅🇺🇸 @Soaringeagle45]

Worth the read! 🤣😂

A man known locally as "Hushpuppy Hank" was arrested Tuesday night after allegedly refusing to leave Captain King's Seafood City for nearly eleven hours, insisting he had not yet reached what he described as "optimal buffet performance."

According to restaurant employees, 44-year-old Hank "Hushpuppy Hank" Williams arrived shortly after noon carrying a notebook, two pens, and the confidence of a man who had absolutely no plans for the remainder of the day.

Staff say he purchased a buffet ticket at 12:07 PM and immediately began what witnesses later described as "an endurance event disguised as lunch."

Employees became concerned when Hank started referring to each trip to the buffet as a "round."

"He kept announcing things like, 'Round Seven is underway,'" said one customer. "At first we thought he was joking. By Round Fifteen, nobody was laughing."

Witnesses claim Hank spent the afternoon rotating between the crab legs, fried catfish, popcorn shrimp, and dessert stations while taking strategic hydration breaks and occasionally pacing the dining room to "increase storage capacity."

Several customers reported seeing him ranking menu items in a notebook.

The hushpuppies reportedly received a perfect score and were later described by Hank as "the Michael Jordan of side dishes."

At approximately 6:45 PM, employees say Hank informed nearby diners that he was entering what he called "The Championship Rounds."

By 8:00 PM, staff noticed he had become emotionally attached to a section of the buffet and was referring to it as "my territory."

When management announced the restaurant would be closing, witnesses say Hank looked genuinely confused.

"He asked if the restaurant was closing permanently or just for the evening," said one manager.

After learning it was the latter, Hank allegedly requested permission to remain overnight and promised to "stay out of everybody's way."

Management declined.

Police were called after multiple requests for him to leave were ignored.

According to officers, Hank argued that an all-you-can-eat buffet should remain open until customers voluntarily admit defeat.

"He told us he was pacing himself," one officer reported. "Then he asked if we had any idea how many shrimp were left."

As officers escorted him from the restaurant, Hank reportedly turned toward the buffet, placed his hand over his heart, and delivered one final statement.

"Eleven hours isn't overeating," he said.

"It's commitment."

Captain King's Seafood City reopened Wednesday morning after employees completed what management described as "an extensive emotional recovery process."

Cliff Messer

[Three Year Letterman @3YearLetterman]

President’s Day is a somber day for me, because I’m thinking about two great American heroes who are no longer with us, one President and one Vice President

Ben Franklin needs no introduction. He was born in the USA in the early 1700’s and went on to become president and invent freedom, currency, electricity, and democracy

Dan Quail is less well known but almost equally as important. He was the youngest VP in American history and is best known for embarrassing doddering old man Lloyd Benson in the Vice Presidential Debate

What do you miss most about these two?

[❥ 𝑪𝒐𝒇𝒇𝒆𝒆 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑭𝒂𝒏𝒔 ❥ @tonyhawktruther]

String of words your grandpa lets out when he stubs his toe

[Misty @kstatevangirl]

BE PREPARED EVERYONE!! ❄️With the most recent forecasts, this is rapidly turning into a multiple bread loaf situation. During extreme winter weather preparations in the State of Kansas. It’s important you stick to the following method: (1/5)
-Panic

[Buitengebieden @buitengebieden]

Dashing through the snow.. 😅

[Colin McCarthy @US_Stormwatch]

This footage from inside the eye of Category 5 Hurricane Melissa might be the most jaw-dropping video ever captured of a hurricane’s eye, showcasing the infamous “stadium effect."

[Jason Kenney 🇨🇦🇺🇦🇮🇱 @jkenney]

I see the blame Canada crowd is out in full force today.

For them, it is a “provocation” to quote America’s greatest post war President articulating his life-long opposition to protectionism, and support for free trade.

They’re deeply concerned that Donald Trump’s feelings have been hurt by having to listen to Ronald Reagan.

They’re now repeating Trump’s laughable claim that Reagan was a protectionist.

They amplify Trump’s absurd claim that Canada triggered a massive trade war through southbound migration and fentanyl smuggling, despite the clear fact that northbound smuggling of narcotics, guns, and migrants from the US to Canada are all massively higher.

When Trump said on January 7 that his plan was to use “economic force” to “acquire and annex Canada,” how did the blame Canada crowd respond? By blaming Canada.

There is no simple solution to dealing with Trump’s attacks on our economy. Given his capriciousness and apparent determination to cannibalize entire Canadian industries, there may be no solution at all.

But in finding the best way forward, we should understand that Canada isn’t to blame for this mess, and that grovelling is not a strategy.

[🇺🇸Sheri @SheriCarter18]

Ozzy Pawsbourne the prince of barkness. 😂

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

My day has instantly become better after watching this

[Flappr @flapprdotnet]

"So, you invented a meme template"

"Yes, Dave."

"And everybody's been using it this week?"

"That's correct, Dave."

"And the meme template is just me looking quizzical over people's life choices?"

"Apparently so, Dave."

[Buitengebieden @buitengebieden]

Mission Impawsible..

It’s the combat roll for me.. 😂

[Paul Bronks @SlenderSherbet]

"START THE CAR JANICE I FORGOT MY WALLET"

[The Sting @TheStingisBack]

The C**t Song by Steve Coogan
This is the heartwarming, wholesome content your timeline needs.

[Steve Inman @SteveInman]

Man vs. Nutty Squirrel

[Steve Inman @SteveInman]

The only time a cashier plastic shield is useful.

[Maria Drutska 🇺🇦 @maria_drutska]

I AM GOING TO LONDON! 🖤

I’ve been awarded a Chevening Scholarship from @FCDOGovUK – one of the most prestigious and competitive scholarships in the world. From nearly 103,000 applicants from 160 countries, I was among 1% to be selected, still feels surreal.

I’m beginning my second masters, MA in International Relations at @KingsCollegeLondon, @WarStudies – one of the world’s pre-eminent centers for war, conflict, and global security, with leading faculty, influential alumni, and deep engagement in current issues. For someone with my background in foreign affairs, security & defense, and for a Ukrainian living through a war, this is a dream💫.

I am endlessly grateful to @CheveningFCDO and @UKinUkraine for believing in me.

See you in London!
#ChosenforChevening #MyCheveningJourney #Chevening

[Spencer Hakimian @SpencerHakimian]

The French eat loaves of bread like they’re stalks of celery.

They eat red meat with every meal.

They drink wine daily.

They bake in the sun for hours per day.

And they smoke cigarettes like the world is ending tomorrow.

Yet, they live to 83, while Americans die at 77.

Why is that?

[Molly Jong-Fast @MollyJongFast]

@BillAckman @realDonaldTrump @elonmusk Why are you wrong about everything?