jasylonian

I'm so awesome at social media that strippers follow me!

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@JakeSchuermanTV @SeanCunningham If Dalton Rushing is catching, that is an exceedingly valid concern.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@ShamsCharania That future pick better be from 2080. Did the Kings get anything back?

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

I miss the days when buying something did not mean giving the seller the right to spam the f@&$ out of you.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@LegionHoops @Vivek you needed to try harder to make this happen.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@SouthwestAir you suck. Stop sending me e-mails after you give me a crap seat trying to sell me a better seat.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

She either wants food or to kill me. Her food bowl is full…

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

If I owned a sports bar, every time the teams took a hydration break, I’d yell, “Hydration break!” and strongly encourage my patrons to drink.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

Microsoft Word thinks I’m French.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

If we find whomever is behind these Amazon fraud hotline spam calls, we should unalive them on the spot.

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

As a nation, we need to stop watching @Netflix live events.

[Peter B @realpeteyb123]

Ok… most of you know I was in the organic baby formula business, but what you don’t know is I dabbled in diapers as well.

I also know this baby2baby “non profit” and have had past interactions with them.. I’ll leave that out for now..

Let’s dive into this absolute grifting nonsense. Prepare to be shocked.

California is about to spend $20 million of taxpayer money to give 100,000 newborns 400 diapers each through Baby2Baby.

Do the math with me:
100,000 babies × 400 diapers = 40 million diapers

$20,000,000 ÷ 40,000,000 = $0.50 per diaper!!!!!

Now walk into any Costco in California and you can buy the same quality diapers for .12 to .15 cents each!

That’s $48 to $60 for 400 diapers.
So the state is paying 8–10x more per diaper than a regular family buying in bulk.

They could’ve just handed every low-income new mom $100 cash and told her to go to Costco. She’d get more diapers, better ones if she wanted, and still have money left for formula, wipes, or whatever the hell she actually needs.

But nah… that wouldn’t let Gavin and his connected “nonprofit” girls running the show there cut ribbons, take photos, do galas and be friends with celebrities and brag about the “first-in-the-nation” program while skimming their cut for “administration” and “partnerships.”

This is peak government stupidity!!!

Spend way more money to feel good and look good, instead of just trusting parents with their own damn money.
We’re not helping babies. We’re funding another bloated nonprofit-government grift.

Math doesn’t lie. The diaper math is brutal.

What a scam and a joke!!!!!

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@BestBuy when I turn off notifications in your app, I expect them to stay off. WTF?!?

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@ChipotleTweets IT. SHOULD. NOT. BE. FASTER. TO. GO. THROUGH. THE. LINE. Every f@&$ing time!!!

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@KyleDraperTV I’m going to miss your call. Best of luck!

[Michigan Men's Basketball @umichbball]

Job Finished. ☑️

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@James_HamNBA what about Red Panda?

[HustleBitch @HustleBitch_]

🚨 NASA WARNS ARTEMIS II FACES A HIDDEN THREAT — FLAMMABLE ASTRONAUT FARTS COULD BUILD UP INSIDE ORION

A science expert just said something on television that NASA doesn’t usually say out loud…

Astronauts fart in space.
And inside the Orion spacecraft… space farts don’t just disappear.

Those fumes can actually be flammable.

• Farts release methane + hydrogen in a sealed capsule
• Both gases can build up in a confined environment
• NASA studied astronaut diets for YEARS to reduce how much they fart
• Apollo recordings caught crews complaining about how brutal it got inside

Now Artemis II is about to test this again.

Yes, Orion has air scrubbers… but in a small capsule, with multiple astronauts, for days…

It doesn’t just go away.
It builds.

And in space, there’s nowhere to escape it.

How bad do you think it actually gets inside that capsule?

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@br_betting @FDSportsbook Blocked and muted!

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@DeuceMason But you’re telling me Patrick Baldwin is available?

[jasylonian @jasylonian]

@Walmart I’m never buying crap from you again. If the delivery agent claims it was delivered; but it never gets to me, I’m SOL. Screw you.