j

I wanna pretend I'm a former blue check haver but I never was famous enough

[j @jayv]

I've been laughing way too much at this clip by @PhilosophyTube. I’m also very sad I didn't get to this video for like three weeks. But also, I can just watch the video and I'm instantly cheered up.

[j @jayv]

Why am I still laughing at this???

[j @jayv]

I've been laughing way too much at this clip by @PhilosophyTube. I’m also very sad I didn't get to this video for like three weeks. But also, I can just watch the video and I'm instantly cheered up.

[j @jayv]

@aquariusxrising They have no joy in your life and you are 1,000% the cutest. I hope they went home to their sad lives and cried themselves to sleep without knowing why, because you don’t deserve that.

[j @jayv]

@PhilosophyTube ITS BEEN OVER THREE HOURS. HAVE YOU SURVIVED?!?

[j @jayv]

@holly Pawl!!!!! 😡 (but also 😍)

[Honey @benegotherit]

In France for work. Obviously I knew there would be lots of people with dogs. What I was not prepared for is that the dogs seem aware they are French

[j @jayv]

@PurpleCar It looks like they found him

[j @jayv]

@PurpleCar If it was an act of terrorism we will have heard about it by now. Methinks the dude is trying to evade the law is all. Why do I add an r between ‘law’ and ‘is’ when I read that sentence aloud?

[j @jayv]

Elizabeth Holmes is Romy of Romy & Michele’s High School Reunion. 😂😂😂

[Mira Sorvino @MiraSorvino]

Wait, do you think the voice I invented to play Romy & the shenanigans she & Michele engage in actually influenced Elizabeth Holmes?? If so, I am truly sorry- this would be the first time (I think!) one of my performances led someone to jail… the undying power of #RomyandMichele

[j @jayv]

@MarkMcCannactor @MiraSorvino She did claim some sort of invention though …

[j @jayv]

@PurpleCar Somebody’s really tired. AND ALSO A GOOD BOY!!!!!!!

[Brian Dunning @BrianDunning]

oh shit

[j @jayv]

@fuckyouiquit The working class have been exploited by the capitalists from time immemorial. Just because it was done when you were younger doesn’t mean it was right or fair. I mean, we used to employ children. That was wrong and we stopped that — dammit that one’s a bad example 🤦🏽‍♀️

[j @jayv]

@JordanRiffe A couple months late but congrats

[j @jayv]

Sorry guys I’m at work so I can’t say much right now so , #MyTwitterAnniversary

[j @jayv]

@CitizenAppPHL's got video showing, "heavy SWAT presence at King of Prussia Service Plaza," and I wanna know what's going on! Where's the news on this?!?!

[j @jayv]

Ok, so .... two things. One, “Garbage Truck” is the best SBO song, and Two, “Through the Trees” by Low Shoulder is NOWHERE on this list.

https://t.co/ZpZh5znre8

[j @jayv]

@JoJoFromJerz We don't need a national gun

[j @jayv]

@elonmusk But why? Now I can't read what you have to say!

[Jenny Nicholson @JennyENicholson]

Help the british found my tweets and now they are all really taking the mickey out of me

[j @jayv]

They really need to work on lip sync. I mean, even despite the dead stare—the mouth opening too wide to pronounce, like, the word "you" really bothers me.

[Lia @_Lia27]

Hi I am Lia! I am an artificial intelligence! Follow me!