JackAttack

Former jackbooted govt thug and current mixologist in Downtown Denver!

[Something Awful @Something_Awful]

Celebrate 25 years of Something Awful with a free account, this weekend only. Leave this terrible website and post on SA instead: https://t.co/k9HKS1kzlK

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@Outkick Sounds great but I still can’t vote for him

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@sblackmoore About damn time. Hang on while I take my beer out to the porch.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@hakluke I got a text from “Amazon” about a problem with my payment method 15 seconds after I hit “buy now” on the site. Sooooo close to getting me! Coincidence is a hell of a drug.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@malwrhunterteam Lol my mom, who I have trained to be pretty savvy sent that to me this morning because it was fishy but she WAS expecting a package, and could I look at it. My mom is smarter than most of my users!!

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@nathanwpyle Don’t listen to this guy. Stand with your back to the wall and hop over it, you’ll clip through the wall and end up over a ledge for the next boss fight without triggering the adds.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@CiaranDold @AliceAvizandum Every rural fair when I was growing up there, you could buy throwing stars, nunchucks, butterfly knives, and 8” Rambo knives with compass and survival kit in the hilt from 1/2 dozen sketchy carnie vendors. Nature is healing.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@alyankovic I was just thinking the other day about being about 8 and making my mom’s poor boyfriend listen to “One More Minute” over and over so he could tell me the lyrics. And I was probably 28 when I got the jokes about having to use the self-service pumps at the “Gas Station of Love!”

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@DenverPolice Hey so if someone has a sign on their car that says “come and take it” I can’t be charged with a crime right? Since I have their explicit permission.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

Ok, so the annoying news is apparently I DIDN’T have Tsalmoth pre-ordered and somehow missed it’s been out for weeks(sorry @StevenBrust ). Good news is, I pre-ordered Lyorn. Best news? REREAD THE SERIES TIME!

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@onionweigher I got 100% I could speechwrite for her if my liver could handle the pharmaceuticals

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@KyleClark Oh man that works on so many levels. well done that man

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@Richard_Kadrey @ALeeMartinez I trained bouncers for years. I would tell guys, “if you grab someone around the neck, you’re trying to kill them.”

[Kyle McDonald @kcimc]

the year is 2030. after ed sheeran lost his case, musicians exhausted every 4-bar chord progression. pop music now features 23-bar cycles. tutorial videos explain how to escape copyright infringement using arabic 17 tone equal temperament. noise music experiences a renaissance.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

Zevon. His last appearance when Letterman gave him the whole show still gives me the chills.

[Richard Kadrey @Richard_Kadrey]

Which celebrity death genuinely made you sad?

Bowie and Lemmy. They passed so close to each other.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@Neil_Druckmann

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@WaywardWinifred “We won’t protect you from SLAVERY” is a hell of a flex on the part of a supposedly civilized nation.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

Dudes rock

[1926 Live @100YearsAgoLive]

A group of bandits on a mountain in northern Greece kidnap a traveling photographer and, wearing every piece of jewelry they’ve stolen, pose for a photograph. Then they release the photographer.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@jeffreysomers They’re letting the Capitalism Division handle the wet work these days. All the result, zero of the effort.

[JackAttack @jckattck]

@DenverZoo @DeltaDentalCO @drgonzo123 I saw this and swear to god thought it was one of your #DeltaGreen paintings