Jordan Parker

Independent fictional news commentator covering U.S and current events

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Trump lies: "Oil will come dropping down as soon as Iran gives up, as soon as the war is over, which will be soon. Prices for groceries have come way down for Biden. Almost every price has come way down.

[Nick Sortor @nicksortor]

🤣🔥 President Trump, in the middle of a MAJOR rain storm, stopped to brag to the press about his new White House driveway

"Looks nice, doesn't it?!"

There'll never be another President like Donald J. Trump 😂

[ThePersistence @ScottPresler]

I’M SCREAMING!

The Supreme Court is allowing states to use the SAVE database to verify the eligibility of voters on the rolls.

SAVE = Systematic Alien Verification for Entitlements

This is a HUGE win for the American people & we will find out if any non-citizens vote this November.

Pass the SAVE America Act!

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

@ScottPresler Huge!

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

🚨 JUST IN: President Trump CONFIRMS he brought up the Iran war behind closed doors with Chinese President Xi Jinping
#25Sept #usa18 #Trump #china

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

🚨 JUST IN: President Trump announces he will be meeting with Xi TWO MORE TIMES this year, including a trip to CHINA in November

I'm hoping that means a LOT of progress was made during this visit 👀
#trending #china #usa #trump

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Xi and his wife hold hands. Trump and Melania

#trending #trump #usa #news

[Acyn @Acyn]

Trump: A friend of mine is a very obese person. I said, you're an extremely obese person. He's begging me not to mention his name because I'll destroy his reputation. He had some fat drugs. I said: it's not working—you look like shit.

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Trump on Canada: "They think they're a state, but they're not a state"

[Eric Daugherty @EricLDaugh]

🚨 JUST IN: Ontario Premier Doug Ford is so TRIGGERED by President Trump renaming to Lake America that he rushed to put up a massive sign

HE BROKE THEM 🤣🤣

FORD: "Long after President Trump is gone, it will still be called Lake Ontario!"

[Acyn @Acyn]

Darline Graham: People are moving to South Carolina in droves, to get away from the blue state policies of the democratic socialists. We cannot and must not allow democratic socialists to gain a foothold in our conservative state like South Carolina

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Darline Graham: Government run health care…. bad idea after bad idea. Annie Andrews backs it all. I have a different background. My parents worked long, hard hours. If that were sick, they had to get up and go to work.

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Trump says Biden gave us "the transgender mutilization of your children," mimics transgender weightlifters, and brags about his theme song being "the gay national anthem" -- all within one minute

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

RNC Chair Joe Gruters defends Darlene Graham: "I will tell you she is supportive of the president. That means the president trusts her and trusts her judgment. At the end of the day, she will be a MAGA warrior ... it's a quick learning curve once you're thrown in there."

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Sen. Jim Banks: "President Trump's legacy is going to be that he was the president who brought peace to the Middle East and to the whole wide world ... we can be grateful and proud of that"

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Melania Trump: "Fostering the Future elevates America's youth based on merit and talent"

[White House Press Office @PressSec]

President Trump’s Golden Dome Moves from Vision to Reality

https://t.co/uQcIpx9tqS

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

@SecRollins: "What we are facing in America today is the direct result of a war on cattle by the previous in administration."

Thanks to @POTUS: "For the first time since 2018 we're now seeing a turn where the cattle numbers are moving back up."

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Idaho is considering Abortion up until BIRTH… Prop 1 on the upcoming election.

A pro-life group met at a mom and pop shop called Wydaho Roasters Coffee in Driggs to strategize on how to make sure this doesn’t pass.

[Jordan Parker @jdparkerr]

Truth

[Aaron Rupar @atrupar]

Trump: "When our country is strong, interest rates should go down. When our country is weak, frankly they should go up."