Justin Browne

Dr. Putty

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

I also miss all the shots I do take, so... 🤷

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

"On a scale of zero to infinity, we have not found such a phenomenon"
"Have you checked one?"
"We have checked one and would like to delete the history of this conversation"
"Are you saying you found the phenomenon at a value of one?"
"No comment"

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

When my grandmom asks what a cuckold is

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

"Go birds"
"And also with you"

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

Me: I'm gonna go home
Aunt: You're gonna walk? Do you want mace or something?
Me: No, I've got Ma$e in my phone, if you know what I mean
Aunt: The rapper?
Me: This is the exact reference I was making

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

Dear Carly,
We've never met. Why would I think you'd write a song about me?! What a dumb suggestion...

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

@iBecca_Zombie ❤️ I miss you guys, too! None of my current coworkers know who Karl Havoc is...

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

My new years resolution is UWQHD

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

@iBecca_Zombie

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

@FinnAlBoss Wait until I tell you about their dairy!

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

@FinnAlBoss It's a quality city

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

The SNL cameraman after Mos Def kisses the camera

[Alexander Gerst @Astro_Alex]

Sprachlos.

[Governor Gretchen Whitmer @GovWhitmer]

Damn it feels good to be a Michigander.

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

If I've learned one lesson from horror movies, it's that you should never move

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

I'm not trying to be a Negative Nancy, but it's been hours and my mouth still tastes like malort

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

@iBecca_Zombie Can't. Been dead

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

I just saw a Christmas themed commercial

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

@Bommar49 Yeah, it's a diamond

[Justin Browne @jebdude89]

Inspector Clouseau it's my favorite marvel superhero