Jennifer Wright

[MaddPlaider @MaddPlaider]

She was literally trying to stop the democratic process because she didn't like the election results #DCRIOTS #AshliBabbitt

[Abe Yospe @Cheeseboy22]

My son wants two $50 Lego sets for Christmas so that he can make them & then 2 days later, throw the pieces into his giant barrel of Legos.

[mark @TheCatWhisprer]

[trying to stop my toddler's tantrum in a restaurant]
*harsh whisper* If you don't cut it out right now then there's nothing else I can do

[Ivy @IvyRichey]

The bachelor is just like real life except girls don't find out there's other contestants until about week 7 or 8

[Stephanie Ortiz @Six_Pack_Mom]

I hate when they want food & there's no food & I have to be the one to go & buy & cook the food just so they can say they hate the food.

[Jennifer Wright @jenny_wrightnow]

We love to bake cookies for santa and watch some xmas classics in our new jammies #bzzTheHalls #BiteSizedBzz

[Sarah Silverman @SarahKSilverman]

"In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart."
Anne Frank

[SouthernHomo @SouthernHomo]

Interviewer: What are your skills?

Me: Throwing shade, talking shit, complaining

[rob fee @robfee]

There's not a day that goes by where I don't think about that Backstreet Boy asking his pals, "am I sexual?" & they're like, "yeah."

[Jennifer Wright @jenny_wrightnow]

Just realized that changing my old MySpace layouts was lightweight coding, my bank account could look a lot different if I stuck with it lol

[Sandra @Sanbel11]

Do I just call you or should we resolve this quickly with 200 text messages?

[jonny sun @jonnysun]

[normal life]
ive worn the same shirt everyday for a week
[packing for vacation]
hmmm. i'll prob change a few times a day so thats…32 shirts

[Jennifer Wright @jenny_wrightnow]

@tacobell all I wanted for valentine's day was a boss nacho. My dreams have been dashed

[HyBrasil House @HyBrasil_House]

Sex is nature's way of tipping your genitals for handling all the gross bathroom stuff.

[stephanie mcmaster @Smethanie]

I slept with this guy and left him SO speechless, he hasn't been able to call or text since. Still got it!

[Jennifer Wright @jenny_wrightnow]

@lovemysilk love to relax with this delicious #silknog, it really gets me in the festive holiday spirit! #gotitfree

[Jennifer Wright @jenny_wrightnow]

@lovemysilk The holiday season is upon us, enjoy some cheer w/ a healthy twist with #silknog creamy & tasty & w/o the calories! #gotitfree

[Jennifer Wright @jenny_wrightnow]

@quaker granola &yogurt blend cups help give me the energy i need to get through my day! get yours @kroger #gotitfree #energy #tastybizness