Jeri Lynn Snyder

how can I become a moderate internet celebrity with little to no effort?

[Cartoons Hate Her! @CartoonsHateHer]

Had a dream that I was, for some reason, in charge of creating the first Lesbian Hooters and was interviewing some lesbians in a focus group about how they wanted the waitresses to dress and they said "we just want them to be comfortable and happy, maybe some nice sneakers."

[👼 @xtsygirll]

i’m like if a girl was an uncle

[Taco Bell Quarterly @TBQuarterly]

The Taco Bell finger pointing is a psyop to redirect attention from the real culprit, the deregulation and lack of oversight in our food supply. pass it along and live más comrade

[kiesha @kiesha9i]

quitting my job to pursue my real passion. kissing my cat on the top of its head.

[erika @yeeeerika]

they should make a grocery store exclusively for people with spatial awareness

[miri @eggoslug]

I got that deer in me im going to jump in front of your car

[mima 𓅰 @cormorantics]

everytime i hit 10k steps while birding i smoke a couple cigarettes to make sure im not extending my longevity

[bug girl @buggirl]

in nature if a monkey hoarded 1 trillion bananas the other monkeys would beat that monkey to death and take his bananas

[Jill Gutowitz @jillboard]

i just found out that men also play soccer… processing this

[Brian @midsommarz]

I wish I knew about concert ticket prices and if phones were allowed at Phoebe Bridgers tour there should be discourse about this

[Dan Douglas @dandouglas]

you couldn’t even write a book called “the very hungry caterpillar” these days. it would have to be something like, “the very cunty caterpillar”. or “the caterpillar who served cunt”. because of woke

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

having a male cat is so cool its like having a eunuch advisor who doesn't know anything about the world

[lilium @pukeirl]

when god closes a door so you reach your little paws under and go meow

[soup🌱 @thrluv]

sometimes the big dog (me) need a pup cup (sweet treat)

[Samantha Ruddy @samlymatters]

4/20 feels different since they legalized weed. Not as fun. Or maybe we’re on the brink of nuclear war and I’m not 19 anymore. Who’s to say?

[Papii🥤 @ammalusty]

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they're having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

[Hadas Weiss @weiss_hadas]

i bring a sort of “none of this means anything” vibe to the workplace that no one there appreciates

[hera @shiningdaisies]

gonna start saying not all men when someone says something positive about a man