Jessdani

Writer of things, aspiring prohibition historian. Eternally waiting. Sometimes I'm clever.

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@ask_aubry It must be exhausting to think like this

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@StevenRayMorris Yes

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@Fizzygrrl Yes

[Jessdani @jessdani]

If you're an Uber/Lyft driver and you use my time to trick me into talking about the bible... Fuuuuck you.

[Jessdani @jessdani]

Listen, I'm not trying to judge the final episode of Ted lasso, but they missed a HUGE chance by not calling zava's avocado a zavocado.

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@LakotaMan1 Absolutely

[Jessdani @jessdani]

Hey Florida humans, how are you?

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@nytimes It's the first episode

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@LukeRomyn Luke. We all do.

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@NickAdamsinUSA K.

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@IanIandrever1 @fiona_skywalker @InflamedWood @EricIdle What? Please explain

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@InflamedWood @EricIdle How is drag sexual?

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@GOP Except for when it's limiting which people can perform and what they're allowed to perform in, or when trying to ban all the books they disagree with, or when they're making women's bodies their business

[Jessdani @jessdani]

My husband minds his own business so hard that this morning he was willing to risk that I'd called in or that my work had a snow day rather than wake me up to check if I'd accidently slept in. 🤣

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@MerriamWebster And also raccoon. Seems like too many letters

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@MerriamWebster Maintenance

[Jessdani @jessdani]

I don't think that girl is Madeline McCann, but if she is, that will be wonderful. And also awful and heartbreaking.

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@kate_mckean Im still confused

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@AlfredoSaintJe1 @ConSelfOwns One of them shot people and the other wants to preserve the earth so it can keep on housing human beings

[Jessdani @jessdani]

@OnPunsnNeedles We put down one of our dogs last year and in the room, they had chocolates and lots of cheese and several other treats for her last moments, along with massage-room-like lighting and soundtrack.