Jesse Bontreger

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Could never handle a relationship because that requires 100% honesty and 100% honesty is me admitting I’ve had the theme song for My Date with the President’s Daughter stuck in my head for 20 years

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Society may have moved on from talking about Red Lobster’s cheddar bay biscuits but I sure haven’t

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Say what you will about my character but I have never once wavered in my absolute disgust and hatred toward the Minions

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@moonwatcher1 Just hosted a screening to celebrate my 30th birthday and the 30th anniversary of this iconic film. Still one of my all time childhood favorites!

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Me

[DepressedBergman @DannyDrinksWine]

What is the best character who wears "glasses"?

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Dropped a greasy piece of chicken shawarma on my khakis and I fear they may be ruined

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Sick and tired of this karaoke DJ… What do you mean I’m “not allowed to sing the O’Reilly’s Auto Parts jingle after what happened last time”???

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@Musachaudhry Or Jim Carrey as Ace Ventura to… this

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@Musachaudhry Paul Giamatti in Big Fat Liar to Barry Bostwick in Bigger Fatter Liar might have this beat tbh

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@500arts @se1wob This rocks

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Does the professional plumbing community embrace or reject Mario as a symbol of their trade

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Spending Super Bowl Sunday watching 80 for Brady, the way God intended!

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@lilaaron911 Gentleman and scholar Lil Aaron

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

You just know the studio execs’ eyes went wide when the titles were pitched

[DiscussingFilm @DiscussingFilm]

Showtime is planning multiple ‘BILLIONS’ spin-offs, including ones titled ‘MILLIONS’ and ‘TRILLIONS’.

(Source: https://t.co/28m5g6qYbv)

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

I’ve always felt that Dorothy telling the scarecrow “I’ll miss you most of all” right in front of the lion and the tin man was kind of a dick move

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@sa_meow @PlentyOfNuggets Busted.

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

@davidcmcguire @letterboxd Welcome, brother! Excited for your hot takes.

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

What a night on the Variety red carpet

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Am I wrong
https://t.co/tvJlU2CbrV

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Music industry could learn a thing or two from the absolute banger that is the State Farm hold music

[Jesse Bontreger @jessebontreger]

Alright who’s keeping the airport shoe shine stands in business