Jesse

please don’t crush my soy nuts

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

My whack parents decided to renew their vows at Burning Man👰🏼🔥

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

3 1/2 years later and I still can’t have a cat because my apartment isn’t pet friendly

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

I spent the morning looking for a cat to adopt when I’m financially stable and independent which won’t be for another three years

[Chelsea Peretti @chelseaperetti]

robot overlords wud solve the pandemic so fast

[Chelsea Peretti @chelseaperetti]

Wow

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

his neighbors are probably terrified of him now

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

my brother has officially gone off the rails. he’s been living alone in seattle, not leaving his apartment since march of last year except to get groceries at trader joe’s. tonight he started painting sad clowns on his TJ’s bags to hang in his window

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

goats bite

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

@kimberlythienes saw this while eating my third tum <3 you know me

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

yesterday i saw the teacher from high school that made my life hell in home goods holding up a 6ft tape measure between her and other people to make sure nobody got close to her and honestly i wasn’t surprised

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

If I could have a few hot girls start wearing gauchos again that’d be great. I know they’re hideous but they’re so comfortable and I’m not hot enough to start the trend. Somebody please sacrifice their dignity for me

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

@fangirlizzy Thank you!!

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

That skating girl on tik tok made me and every other human want roller skates because I’ve been searching for a pair in my size online for over two hours and there’s not a single pair for sale under $150

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

https://t.co/Ur4fMzEoQF

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

@Alainabuggg didn’t end till the end of january

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

I should’ve known 2020 was gonna be terrible bc I started off the year dating a dude named Kyle

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

@sabslilboat yeah it was not something i like to brag about

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

@sabslilboat he was also in the military I think I had a three month long stroke

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

Hey I haven’t tweeted in over a year

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

@claradogg4 May 24-27th :)))

[Jesse @jessegwen23]

I just spent all my money on a plane ticket to Eugene I should just die

[can of worms @lilypond9]

milk’d #NewProfilePic