jennifer chan

[jennifer chan @jethe]

Celebrating Memorial Day by not romanticizing the military. http://t.co/I9A1nukdJI

[jennifer chan @jethe]

Smoke alarms are really just toast alarms. http://t.co/rH7VzFsWTg

[jennifer chan @jethe]

A polaroid is what an eskimo takes when he wants to bulk up. http://t.co/meyrAvAOL2

[jennifer chan @jethe]

http://t.co/rnsitMbc4D If your bathroom sink looks like mine, you're disgusting and I'm a hypocrite.

[jennifer chan @jethe]

Startup idea: Toilet Paper App. Wipe your ass with your actual phone. Reusable. http://t.co/gpBHvYYhg3

[jennifer chan @jethe]

http://t.co/8ZLTAXCMu1 I shaved my commute time in half by changing my car's horn to sound like gunfire.

[jennifer chan @jethe]

How can we know atheism exists? Where's the evidence? http://t.co/DaUiuOkjiP

[jennifer chan @jethe]

I bet when you go to hell they make you wear your hair like you did in 5th grade http://t.co/FYI3ukQoSp

[jennifer chan @jethe]

Sneezed. Nobody blessed me. Going to hell. http://t.co/BPC6giaLdl

[jennifer chan @jethe]

http://t.co/X2AihyHtmb How can we know atheism exists? Where's the evidence?

[jennifer chan @jethe]

Twitter can be like talking to crazy homeless people through protective glass. http://t.co/NSnuIcinvC

[jennifer chan @jethe]

I just threw a rock at a guy who was getting Subway breakfast. He understood why. http://t.co/yQlUN7nj

[jennifer chan @jethe]

Every KFC meal comes with a large side of regret. http://t.co/QScAtAGO

[jennifer chan @jethe]

http://t.co/G41Hno0m If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say, "In Jesus name, amen,"

[jennifer chan @jethe]

http://t.co/0fp4FaNQ Just bought a pair of velcro shoes. What a rip off.

[jennifer chan @jethe]

I wonder who is being John Malkovich right now. http://t.co/lTF9kaKv

[jennifer chan @jethe]

il be doin my assignment..huhu.