Jessie Weinberg

I’m here!

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

Don't know why folks get so grossed out if something accidentally falls in the toilet. All you have to do is burn the house down & walk away

[Rylend Grant @rylendgrant]

New teaser trailer for HAUNTED HEART, the film I wrote starring Matt Dillon & Aida Folch, directed by Academy Award-winning director Fernando Trueba. Coming soon.

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

A stranger texted this to me by accident. I find it quite beautiful

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

Me: Do you know what President Lincoln’s first name was?
6yo: Yes, that’s easy.
Me: Well, what was it?
6: Dinkin.

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

A kid told me that my eyes look like a galaxy with black holes in the middle. But then another kid asked me if I was 70. You win some, you lose some.

[Rylend Grant @rylendgrant]

If you're looking for Girl Scout cookies, my daughter Naomi has a site up! You can have them shipped directly to you. CHECK IT OUT:

https://t.co/8CtXdA4KZJ

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

Wile E. Coyote obviously had Amazon Prime before anyone else.

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

@EleWoodsPHD Yes!!!

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

@YeahHeyItsSteve Meh!

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

@YeahHeyItsSteve Thanks, Steve!

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

I’m in a good mood, but I can’t think of why that would be. So annoying.

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

Are goodie bags treats for having endured an entire party?

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

This is very exciting!!! Yay @rylendgrant ❤️❤️❤️

[Rylend Grant @rylendgrant]

It's "official" when it hits @variety, right? Principal photography on HAUNTED HEART starts in 5 DAYS. Starring Matt Dillon, Aida Folch, & Juan Pablo Urrego. Directed by Fernando Trueba. Written by ME! This one's gonna blow your doors off.

CHECK IT: https://t.co/fFGWqc0IQE

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

The number of times I’ve thought to text my daughter, before remembering she has no phone and can’t yet read, is shocking.

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

But should I get this haircut?

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

“Guess what?! We don’t say butt in kindergarten, we say ‘derrière’!”

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

“I’ll fly to visit you when I live in New York. But I can’t come a ton. Write me a letter if you’re dead.”
- 5 yo, planning for her adult life

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

.@rylendgrant is in a booth next to @kimjoyskitchen at Comic Con!!! I have maybe never been this delighted!!!

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

Does this need context? I don’t think so.

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

@theames @timidfrieda Phew!

[Jessie Weinberg @jeweinbe]

@theames @timidfrieda Did they cross our paths??