Elias

Let's turn science into poetry.

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Another Super Bowl Half Time Show that paled in comparison to Katy Perry’s #smh

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Refer to people from Minnesota as “silly grey duck” instead of “silly goose” #iykyk

[Elias @jewguyeli]

So there’s a unit of measurement called a Gaylord, but when looking up how to convert it, I couldn’t find a straight answer.

[Pulsoid - Heart Rate Streaming @pulsoid_app]

Dead Space giveaway for content creators🎁
Get a chance to win:

✨A Dead Space Remake key + heart rate monitor + 3 months of Pulsoid BRO Plan✨

To enter:
-Like and RT
-Follow @pulsoid_app
-Respond with a comment that contains a link to your active Twitch or YouTube channel

[Elias @jewguyeli]

@pulsoid_app I forgot to use Pulsoid for this one...oops.
https://t.co/uNffeMRKpv

[Ansley Berg @los_anseles]

Dear @squattypotty , my Christmas wish is that you make me the face of your product. Will not be disappointed.

[Elias @jewguyeli]

@dangerkids in Madison last week was fucking awesome. If you’ve never heard them, change that.

[Elias @jewguyeli]

So is @plyaband going to be playing Sykes songs?

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Jingle All the Way > Elf

[Elias @jewguyeli]

All of this Puritan Chicken got me like:

[Elias @jewguyeli]

You either die with FOMO or live long enough to see yourself become the Blitz.

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Someone tell me what ever happened to Air Dubai...

[Elias @jewguyeli]

What kind of drugs was I on when I signed up for graveyard shifts in Georgia this week and in Texas next week.

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Dane Cook told me to "change my fucking face" during his stand up, so I forced myself to laugh at incessant swearing instead of actual jokes

[Elias @jewguyeli]

When life gets you down, you just gotta give it the double thumbs up. #optimism

[Elias @jewguyeli]

@Galante_Time You better give me or AJ a shoutout.

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Side note: @VSMEband's newest album is sick

[Elias @jewguyeli]

Some dude at this concert just called me Ash Ketchum. Bro, Ash is 10 and doesn't have a shitty beard. #cmon

[Elias @jewguyeli]

"DILFs of Trader Joe's has requested to follow you." #whythough