in class: 2+2=4
exam: Kevin has 13 dead hookers in his hotel room, he spins one on a roulette table and tries to land the ball in its mouth, the hooker flies out of the hotel room window and ricochets off a telephone pole into an uncovered manhole. How much money did Kevin win?
[during sex]
him: i want u to hurt me
me: Yoshi was essentially a father figure to Baby Mario, but since he’s unable to speak human language-
him: wait
me: Mario must’ve grown up never knowing that Yoshi is proud of him
him, in tears: stop