DatBichFrieza

bitcoin will reach $350k in 2023

made no money in crypto since 2017

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

stack up lil homies. $230k is still in play

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

@3m0tive that ass looks STINKY

[BowTiedYukon @BowTiedYukon]

2Pac was a faggot

[Nolimitzor @Nolimitzor_X]

Streamer Ice Poseidon Tries Ordering Drinks from a Street Vendor in Chile but gets Spooked and Leaves the Scene 😂🤣

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

sometimes trans girls fart during sex but its not our fault!

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

I found a pair of woman's underwear inside my husband's pocket while I was doing laundry. When I went to confront him about it, i instantly wished i didn't ask. I never expected my hands to tremble while doing laundry but there I was..

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

I'm giving away two Oasis tickets for tomorrow in Cardiff to a random follower who retweets this. Winner chosen at 6pm today. Good luck!

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

I'm giving away two Oasis tickets for tomorrow in Cardiff to a random follower who retweets this. Winner chosen at 6pm today. Good luck!

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

I accidentally rizzed up a fifty year old Japanese lady help

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

The best twitter charlatans are the ones who have moved to south america from the UK. they pretend they are rich because its 3rd world country. rent is £50 a month 😂

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

Everyone on Twitter is lying. No one except like 4 guys are actually rich Zero dudes are making 8 figs doing “copywriting” Mostly a bunch of snake-oil salesman who in actuality work at T-Mobile Stop the cap. Bunch of trustfund dickheads503063743.3K

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

another case of big streamers opening much higher percentage of knives and gloves. valve knows

[FaZe Clan @FaZeClan]

In the past 30 days, FaZe @ZooMaa has pulled SIX KNIVES in CS:GO, of which...

- One was with his last key of the opening
- Three were all in the same opening
- Two were within five cases of each other

Does he have the craziest case luck in history? 🤯
https://t.co/Npb9DgPb3J

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

Are y’all ready for this rabbit hole?

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

@ocelotmma Cory "Sandbagger" Sandhagen

UFC Career Recap

Record 9-3

He faces Rob Font this weekend.

THREAD:

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

Major General Ibrahim Traore, President of Burkina Faso has BANNED gold and diamond exports to France and the United States 🇧🇫 Has said he will goto war if the UNESCO send NATO weapons to ANY African nation.

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

call volga on 149.200? on the codec?

[DatBichFrieza @jimbo__slice__]

remember this was the most hilarious thing half you bitches did in 2016? peak humour