mathias

tw ed - minors & zionists dni !! - relapsed - cw: 43kg gw: 45kg ugw: 40kg

[mathias @jinkilbs]

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ mathias’ edtwt threads ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

[mathias @jinkilbs]

hey guys i've semi-recovered (i just binge and over-exercise all the time lol) so idk how active i'll be on here anymore. will probably be back in a year or so when i relapse again and the cycle continues tho

[mathias @jinkilbs]

i’ve been going swimming a lot this past week which i haven’t done in SIX years, and looking at pics of myself i look so skinny

[mathias @jinkilbs]

i’ve been maintaining at 44.5kg ish for the past two weeks despite eating so so much 😭 what the hell

[mathias @jinkilbs]

i feel like nothing matters anymore, he knew he wanted to break up for SIX months :(((

[mathias @jinkilbs]

hey guys my bf of 4yrs broke up with me last week and while i'm kinda ok my life is in shambles and i'm not really restricting anymore and i think i might become ia on here idk

[mathias @jinkilbs]

@twnfantasy hi !!

[mathias @jinkilbs]

it went very well! we are going stay in touch and i'm welcome at their house anytime

[mathias @jinkilbs]

meeting my ex’s parents tomorrow so i can say goodbye etc, idk what to say

[mathias @jinkilbs]

stopped counting calories a couple of days ago bc i have no appetite at all and i’m constantly nauseous bc of the breakup :/

[mathias @jinkilbs]

meeting my ex’s parents tomorrow so i can say goodbye etc, idk what to say

[mathias @jinkilbs]

this breakup is making my appetite nonexistent and idk i want to recover but i cant see how

[mathias @jinkilbs]

this did not work but it was extremely nice to finally be able to tell him

[mathias @jinkilbs]

in hopes of saving our relationship im going to tell my bf about my ed and that that is the reason ive been off the past year

[mathias @jinkilbs]

on another note we had sex three times in a couple of hours lol, haven’t had that since we first got together

[mathias @jinkilbs]

i told my ex bf (still very weird to say…) everything about my ed and he said he had noticed and knew but didn’t want to comment on it in fear of making me angry :’( also that it was really sad that i was struggling

[mathias @jinkilbs]

we broke up for real :( it was for the best i think

[mathias @jinkilbs]

me n my (ex?) bf decided that we wouldnt text today but that he would send me a message when he was on his way home. he finished work an hour ago and i'm watching his live location even though i shouldnt and he's out and about and idk what he's doing

[mathias @jinkilbs]

is there even a point in trying to save the relationship if my bf has said he’s not really romantically attracted to men anymore? (i know the answer i just can’t imagine a life without him)

[mathias @jinkilbs]

i hate this so much he's been feeling like this for nearly 6 months and hasnt told me :(( i dont want to live alone, i want to live w HIM + im not on social media or able to get friends so i'll never get a new bf that accepts me

[mathias @jinkilbs]

we have to continue living together for at least three months, so ive proposed that we take a break and try to rekindle everything but he seems pretty sure that he doesnt like men romantically anymore and cant see himself living w a men for the rest of his life

[mathias @jinkilbs]

my bf just told me the main issue is that he isnt romantically interested in men anymore, and while i understand that the ship has sailed i cant accept it

[mathias @jinkilbs]

in hopes of saving our relationship im going to tell my bf about my ed and that that is the reason ive been off the past year