El Capitan Trips

Gallows Humorist

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

Just realized @BuckAngel and @kylekinane are the same person

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

Paul Dano looks like Jiminy Cricket wished to be a real boy instead of #Pinnochio

[ClarkQuill97 @CQuill97]

Bo Burnham just summarized every episode of the Joe Rogan podcast

[alias @itsjustanx]

Reminder that Elizabeth Olsen is the most powerful Avenger on and off screen. #ScarletWitch

[Variety @Variety]

Jamie Lee Curtis: "It's about f---ing time that we are here honoring James Hong with a star on the Hollywood Walk to Fame" https://t.co/rX5LabJY82

[David Alan Grier AKA #LeonMusk @davidalangrier]

I’m gon need to see a menu…😐

[ChristianV @GenreFilmAddict]

I’ve seen almost 400 kung-fu and wuxia movies over the past three years, so when I say I’ve never seen a fight like this before, it’s not hyperbole
(Drunken Dragon/Exciting Dragon - dir. Chiu Chung-Hing, 1985)

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

Did medieval thots get anal leeching?

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

@heysethallen Unless you like your burgers with nothing but cheese and extra mayo, I wouldn't worry about it

[David Alan Grier AKA #LeonMusk @davidalangrier]

Limp Bisdit got a new wig hat y’all! 👀

[Jake Silberman @thecomedianjake]

This dad, with two kids in tow, just walked into the ocean wearing a white t, cowboy hat and a full pint glass at 10:30 am. Fucking legend

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

My personal Hell would begin with a normal poop and I would have to wipe for all of eternity

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

@invisoranges MF DOOM always all caps

[Sassy Justice @sassyjustice]

Cheyenne 9’s coverage of the official White House address

[MeidasTouch @MeidasTouch]

Some thoughts on #DiaperDon from @CaslerNoel

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

Why have gender reveal parties when you could just wait till the kid gets an Instagram

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

✨ First To Follow

THEKIDMERO is not following you...
You followed @THEKIDMERO on 02/13/2014 at 21:56:14.

➡️ https://t.co/VwHLectnPd

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

they call it having a crush, but should call it having a cream

[maybe: kelly @theyoungstarbux]

@scottzabielski Here’s the whole list for anyone interested I just got mine today

[Scott Zabielski @scottzabielski]

Well, my Cops Voter Guide just arrived in the mail, let’s just see what—

[El Capitan Trips @jizzbarela]

#TrumpCantBreath