Joseph Heller

Speech writer & Badchen.

[Barnet Council @BarnetCouncil]

We’re aware a burst water main in NW4 has cut off water to properties in nearby areas. For updates on repairs & emergency access to water follow @ThamesWater. Worried about a vulnerable person living in the affected area? Call 020 8359 2000

[CAMERA UK @CAMERAorgUK]

This is truly chilling. Jews, she tells attendees, are your enemies.

[Cllr Alex Prager @CllrPrager]

Once again all pay-to-park bays in @BarnetCouncil will be free every weekend throughout December. Make sure to shop local this festive season and this #SmallBusinessSaturday

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

If Apple build a car, will it have Windows?

[Zalmi U @ZalmiU]

Go figure ...

[Priti Patel MP @pritipatel]

Today I have taken action to proscribe Hamas in its entirety.

This government is committed to tackling extremism and terrorism wherever it occurs.

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@ifyoutickleus How does one circumcise an institution?

[Andreas Fagerbakke @afagerbakke]

Still can't figure out why there's no peace?

Palestinian school magazine calls for ‘armed struggle’ against ‘Israeli monster’ https://t.co/sguyezBZCD

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@elderofziyon @coinabs He should change his name from Joseph to yussuf

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@Lord_Sugar Those countries do not have a House of Lords, where an immigrant who works hard can lift himself up by his bootstraps and be honoured with a place.

I thank God that my father was allowed in to the UK during WW2, rather than Greece, Italy, Belgium or France.

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@ifyoutickleus Looks like it was a mixed seating concert. I seem to have missed the Kol koreh banning it.

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@JuliaHB1 I thought it was a typo, for: a tram crossing

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@jth1538 I hope you are extremely wealthy.

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@EBluemountain1 It's not a question, it's a fact. Yes, yes, yes.

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@ifyoutickleus In compliance with the UOHC decree I will not be going on 6th December 2021

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@MorrisM24 @ifyoutickleus Relatively tiny, yet big enough to chuck the rubbish out.

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@ifyoutickleus I'm probably mistaken, but I believe he is Gateshead born

[Joseph Heller @JoeYosH]

@RachelRileyRR I'd rather he shut up, permanently.