johnny termite

More like ter-might eat some wood later!

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Logging (mmm logs) into this account one last time to vote yes in the Elon poll

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Well folks it’s been real but I can’t think of even one more joke about wood so long

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

If termite Twitter was snake Twitter we’d all be like “mmm mice” instead of “mmm wood”

[termite @termite1008]

yes I’d like one wood-fired pizza, hold the fired pizza

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Thinking about taking a vacation to Redwood National Park this spring

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Only September 2022 termites will remember this

[Aaron Judge’s Bat Termite @BronxTermite]

LIZZO PLAYING JAMES MADISON’S CRYSTAL FLUTE IS COOL AND ALL BUT I NEED MY MITES AND I TO TRY OUT GEORGE WASHINGTON’S WOODEN TEETH 😈😈😈😈

[Termite @termiteprincess]

never need a birch im what a birch need

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

@Herroyaltermite I’ve been regularly having meals at The Unfinished Basement but I really recommend A Forest

[termite 🇵🇸 @termite69420]

who else in that midday slump rn. just need a nice branch to get me through it 😴🥱

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

@termite421 Is there any wood around because if so I would probably start eating the wood

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Folks can we get it to $6 billion

[UberFacts @UberFacts]

Termites cause an estimated $5 billion in property damage every year

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Man I thought Dream was going to be a termite :(

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Job shadowing a carpenter. He doesn’t know about it.

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

@termiteinator ratio

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

@termite761 @TermiteWindmill 😍

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

My doctor put me on a low-bark diet for the next few weeks so I’m afraid it’s just plywood for me :/

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

@termite3127 I didn’t really think the punchline through but yeah I guess so

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

I like my women the way I like my coffee tables

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

@BronxTermite Pretty goddamn delicious

[johnny termite @johnnyhomework]

Just chewed through a power line and knocked out thousands of people’s electricity #Oops #NobodysPerfect #TermiteTwitter