Johno Ellison

Author of
It's on the Meter:One Taxi, Three Mates and 43,000 Miles of Misadventures around the World |
Walking the Wharfe: An Ode to Yorkshire River

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

I wrote a book and it's finally out today!

I grew up on the River Wharfe in Boston Spa and so decided to walk the entire length, retracing the footsteps of a Victorian author

https://t.co/Hmt0AfxHCW

(Photo by Colin Petch)

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@TwoMartinisPls @shesbonky Yeah, I don't even drink coffee and I'm still the one who had to do this in my house because it got to the point that the strainer was almost blocked!

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

Fix puncture, continue
* Second puncture
* @muc_off Puncture Patches absolutely useless
* Backup tube of rubber cement completely dried up
* Have to call my wife for rescue.
* Luckily broke down next to pub...
* ...pub is closed

Saw some nice trees though.

2/2

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

Disaster ride

* Accidentally went off road on the muddiest bridlepath in Yorkshire
* Got a puncture
* Tyre levers snap (any chance of a replacement, @Topeak_Intl ?)
* Fix puncture, continue
* Second puncture

1/2

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@thomasforth Hey Tom, I just saw a similar label nearby (just north of Blackburn) and it got me thinking about this.
I once went on a hike to geographic centre of Great Britain, which was in the Forest of Bowland, very close to this area.
So I wonder if that label is plonked at GB's centre?

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

Someone made the observation earlier that that Charlie xCx and Billy Eilish song is basically a Right Said Fred for Gen Z.

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@Zannabites @fenboy01 Ah, good to know that you can report them, as I've been on loads that were completely overgrown, or blocked by barbed wire etc.

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@drosickeSHO @fenboy01 Cattlegrids wouldn't stop a bike though. Tonnes of them on public roads near me.

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@Zannabites @fenboy01 The problem is that sometimes unscrupulous or unaware landowners sometimes put these notices up.
I've seen Public Footpaths and Bridleways with Private, or No Cycling signs, when its a legitimate Public Right of Way.

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

If you see one of those toast conveyor belts you know it's going to be a top tier breakfast

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

So I played the first thing that came to my head... and it wasn't good enough

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@leighalexander I moved from England to Malaysia and Flying Ant Day is about every two months.
And somehow they can get through window seals!

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

We were buying a metro ticket in Bangkok when a young schoolboy came up and offered to help us.

It says something about a country when a child feels able to go and talk to two adults strangers in a subway station (in a foreign language too!) 😊

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@caitlinwintaur I just had this with Tue and Too. I was really confused, then realised I'm British

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

I'm a simple man. I see a California burrito on the menu, I order it.

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@adam_brown80 @fesshole I'm in Asia and with some of the Uber-esque apps you can request a taxi ride without chitchat

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@outhwaitegeorge @Right_2Roam @nickhayesillus1 @guyshrubsole I had similar on the Dales Way near Dent. One side was completely overgrown thorns and the other was barbed wire.
It's especially bad if you're swaddled up in waterproofs!

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

Was on a flight recently and we all had to fill in Customs Arrival forms.

For the Emergency Contact section the girl next to us scrolled through her phone and then wrote down the number for, "Mr Right 2"

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

Kookaburra landed right next to us!
Taken on my phone from less than a metre away.

#myfirstbirdoftheday

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

I met a backpacker in Europe, years ago, who was sick of looking at old churches and told me, "ABC - another bloody Church".

Since then I've had ABM (Iran), ABW (Iceland), ABT (Thailand), ABP (Myanmar) andABM (Nepal).

In the Blue Mountains it's ABL

[Johno Ellison @JohnoEllison]

@dahontr3 @gazzabiker Plus it just looks way cooler